Feedback is essential for product R&D, as it helps you improve your ideas, designs, and processes. But what if your team member is not open to feedback and reacts defensively or dismissively? How can you resolve a conflict with them and foster a culture of constructive feedback? Here are some tips to help you deal with this challenging situation.
Before you approach your team member, try to understand why they are not open to feedback. Maybe they are feeling insecure, stressed, or overwhelmed by the project. Maybe they have a different vision, style, or preference than you. Maybe they have a history of negative feedback experiences that have affected their confidence or trust. By empathizing with their perspective, you can avoid making assumptions or judgments and prepare yourself to communicate more effectively.
Antes de abordar el tema necesito escuchar sus razones, muchas ocasiones la raíz del conflicto se resuelve escuchando, una vez escucharlo darle una retro con respecto a su actitud y los beneficios que hay en su trabajo al mejorar procesos
Timing and setting are important factors for giving and receiving feedback. If you want to resolve a conflict with your team member, you need to choose a time and place that is conducive to a productive and respectful conversation. Avoid giving feedback when they are busy, distracted, or emotional. Instead, schedule a meeting in advance and find a private and comfortable space where you can talk without interruptions or distractions. This way, you can show your team member that you value their time and attention and that you are not trying to embarrass or undermine them.
The way you deliver your feedback can make a big difference in how your team member perceives and responds to it. To avoid triggering a defensive or dismissive reaction, you need to use a tone and language that is positive, supportive, and specific. Avoid using harsh, vague, or personal criticism that can hurt their feelings or damage their reputation. Instead, use praise, examples, and suggestions that can highlight their strengths and help them improve their areas of improvement. Also, use "I" statements instead of "you" statements to express your observations, feelings, and expectations without blaming or accusing them.
Begin with a genuine compliment, Start the conversation by acknowledging something specific that the team member has done well or a strength they possess. This helps to create a positive atmosphere and shows that you value their contributions. Avoid making assumptions or accusations, and instead, focus on the specific behavior or action that is causing the issue. Use a neutral tone to describe the situation, without placing blame. Share your concern about the impact of their behavior or action on the team or project and show empathy.
Feedback is not a one-way communication, but a dialogue that requires listening and acknowledging. If you want to resolve a conflict with your team member, you need to give them a chance to share their thoughts, feelings, and concerns. Listen actively and attentively to what they have to say, without interrupting or arguing. Acknowledge their points of view, feelings, and efforts, even if you disagree with them. This way, you can show your team member that you respect and appreciate them and that you are not trying to impose your opinions or solutions on them.
The goal of feedback is not to win an argument or to prove who is right or wrong, but to find a mutual agreement that can benefit both parties and the project. To achieve this, you need to seek a common ground and a shared vision with your team member. Identify the problem, the desired outcome, and the criteria for success. Discuss the possible options, pros and cons, and trade-offs. Agree on the action steps, roles, responsibilities, and deadlines. Confirm your understanding and commitment and document your agreement. This way, you can show your team member that you are working together as a team and that you are willing to compromise and collaborate.
Feedback is not a one-time event, but a continuous process that requires follow up and support. If you want to resolve a conflict with your team member, you need to monitor the progress and the results of your agreement. Provide positive reinforcement and recognition when they achieve their goals or make improvements. Offer constructive feedback and assistance when they encounter challenges or difficulties. Solicit feedback and suggestions from them on how you can improve your own performance or the project. This way, you can show your team member that you care about their growth and success and that you are open to feedback as well.