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What are some effective ways to communicate your needs and expectations to your manager or team?

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Communicating your needs and expectations to your manager or team is essential for your confidence, productivity, and career growth. However, it can also be challenging and stressful, especially if you are not sure how to express yourself clearly and respectfully. In this article, you will learn some effective ways to communicate your needs and expectations to your manager or team, and how to overcome some common barriers and fears.

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Martin Goodyer

1 Know your goals and priorities

Before you communicate your needs and expectations to your manager or team, you need to have a clear idea of what you want to achieve, why it is important, and how it aligns with the organizational objectives. This will help you to articulate your message with clarity, confidence, and relevance. You can use tools such as SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound) goals, SWOT (Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, and Threats) analysis, or Eisenhower matrix to help you identify and prioritize your goals.

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Mark Jones

Chief People Officer | People Director | Head of People | HR and Culture Speaker | Culture Specialist | Board Director
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Something that has been a painful process for me but equally a great learning is to get under the skin of your organisational culture. Having clarity of mind through relevent goals is so important but its a dead end if the overriding culture of the business is stagnant or combatant. Equally, its really important to understand the communication style and preference of your manager. If they are highly visual, creative, and extrovert then they might find the rigidity of a 4000 word business case grungy. Equally, if they are a conformist wop operates with structure and rigidty then they might not take you seriously if you don't have all the facts, figures, and projections prepared.

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2 Choose the right channel and timing

Depending on the nature and urgency of your needs and expectations, you may choose different channels and timings to communicate them to your manager or team. For example, you may use email, chat, phone, or video call for simple or routine requests, such as asking for feedback, clarification, or resources. However, for more complex or sensitive issues, such as negotiating a raise, requesting a flexible schedule, or addressing a conflict, you may prefer a face-to-face or video meeting, where you can have a more interactive and nuanced conversation. You should also consider the availability and preferences of your manager or team, and avoid interrupting them when they are busy, stressed, or distracted.

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Martin Goodyer
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The oxygen of any communication is 'rapport'. Not smalltalk in search of things you have in common, but simply 'getting on the same page'. If face to face communication works try asking, "When would be a good time to talk?" this will likely elcit "about what?", allowing you to be topic specific, be on the same page, and know if now is a good time - or if not, when will be. The rule is 'Always start with a question about asking your question'. For example, you might ask if you could share some thoughts about an issue, but wait until you get a response before doing the sharing as your listener needs to feel they are doing the choosing. Tip: Use video messages rather than long emails or voice only messages, and then be clear and concise.

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3 Be assertive and respectful

Being assertive involves expressing your needs and expectations in a confident, honest, and respectful manner without being aggressive, passive, or passive-aggressive. To be more assertive and respectful in your communication, use "I" statements rather than "you" statements as the latter can come off as accusatory or blaming. Additionally, use positive and constructive language rather than negative or critical language. Facts and evidence should be used to support your needs and expectations instead of opinions, assumptions, or emotions. Lastly, active listening skills such as paraphrasing, summarizing, or asking questions can demonstrate that you understand and respect the other person's point of view while helping to clarify any misunderstandings or gaps.

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4 Be flexible and realistic

When communicating your needs and expectations to your manager or team, it is important to be prepared to compromise, negotiate, and adapt depending on the response. It is unlikely that your needs and expectations will be met exactly as you want them, so it is important to be realistic about what you can achieve, the resources you have, and any challenges you may face. To be more flexible and realistic in your communication, prioritize your needs and expectations by identifying which ones are essential, desirable, or negotiable. Anticipate potential objections or alternatives, prepare responses or solutions in advance, seek feedback from your team, and acknowledge any limitations that may affect your needs and expectations. Be open to different perspectives and willing to adjust or revise them accordingly.

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5 Follow up and follow through

After communicating your needs and expectations to your manager or team, you should not assume that they will be fulfilled automatically or immediately. It is important to follow up and follow through with your communication to ensure that everyone is on the same page. To do this, confirm the main points, outcomes, or next steps of your communication verbally or in writing. Additionally, set a timeline, deadline, or milestone for your needs and expectations and communicate them clearly and explicitly. Make sure to also monitor the progress, status, or results of your needs and expectations, providing feedback, recognition, or support as needed. Finally, review the impact, effectiveness, or satisfaction of your needs and expectations and celebrate the achievements, learn from the challenges, or address the gaps.

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6 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?

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What are some effective ways to communicate your needs and expectations to your manager or team?

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1 Know your goals and priorities

2 Choose the right channel and timing

3 Be assertive and respectful

4 Be flexible and realistic

5 Follow up and follow through

6 Here’s what else to consider

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