What are some effective assertiveness techniques for consultants in difficult situations?

Your rights also include the ability to negotiate boundaries such as the hours you are available, SLAs around returning calls or emails or changes to statements of work, etc. Both parties should be clear about expectations, and once agreed to, boundaries should be respected. You should also always have the right to fire the customer if they regularly violate the agreement or are disrespectful.

When expressing your opinions, needs, or boundaries, use "I" statements instead of making accusatory or generalizing statements. For example, say "I feel overwhelmed with the current workload" instead of "You're giving me too much work." This approach promotes open communication and avoids defensiveness or hostility. Listening is a crucial part of assertiveness. Show genuine interest in others' perspectives and actively listen to their concerns. This fosters mutual understanding and enables you to respond effectively. Paraphrasing, summarizing, and asking clarifying questions demonstrate that you value their input and are willing to find common ground.

Planned Parenthood have the organizational value of "acknowledge the reality" which encapsulates this idea of addressing what is going unsaid. Use the DESC model, but also give yourself permission to not have the answer to the C part of the model, the consequences, and make sure you say that out loud to the room/individual. That could sound something like "I don't have the consequences of that fully formed in my head right now, but I hope that you can help me identify them now that we're addressing this head on". This way your inviting your colleagues to participate in the problem solving.

The best way to begin a consultancy is to set the clearest parameters at the beginning of the assignment. Sure needs or goals will change along the way, and you need to be flexible, but you also need to be comfortable with what's being asked. Be clear about employees who may have duties that cross over with your work and the people they're in contact with, so there isn't frustrating duplication. You're leveraging your reputation and contacts, so you want to insure you're not being asked to say or do things you're uncomfortable with- again you have to be able to say no at times while explaining perhaps why. I'd rather always have fewer clients I can be successful with than more or a bigger name across their threshold or greater remuneration.

Body language makes up the majority of non-verbal communication, so it's very important to pay attention to the signals you are sending. Women in particular tend to "take up less space" by sitting with legs crossed demurely where men tend to do the opposite either sitting with legs apart or with crossed with an ankle on the opposite knee. This type of posture is more commanding. Be aware of the unconscious signals you send.

Practice assertiveness skills with peers, friends, family, your mentors or others who will give you honest and constructive feedback. It is a skill that can be developed and will evolve over time.