What are effective ways to resolve conflicts with someone in power?

Con la inteligencia emocional podemos desarrollar las habilidades sociales, lo que nos permite mejorar nuestra comunicación y ser más asertivos a la hora de expresarnos y contar nuestras necesidades. Hacer foco en hechos concretos desde la objetividad, y ser más abiertos a escuchar opiniones de los demás, nos permite mejorar la situación conflictiva.

One thing I have found helpful in dealing with a power hungry manager was complementing them all the time on what they are good at . They enjoy being in power , being the centre of attention.Give them what they crave for .That’s the trick

From my personal experience with managing and resolving conflict with people in power, being able to identify the source of the conflict has helped me in ensuring excellent conflict resolution. I usually separate myself from the issue and look at it objectively. The knowledge of this will help one determine steps to take to resolve the conflict

From my experience this step usualy is not so easy… Most people are not so comfortable to share their feelings and emotions, but asking the right question could provide you with the much needed answers.

From nature's perspective, there is no win-win between the rabbit and the wolf. This same angle applies to some individuals in conflict. Make sure you know if you're the rabbit, or the wolf and what a win means to you. Not everyone is looking for a win-win, even if they say they are.

- Engage in active listening to grasp their perspective thoroughly. - Demonstrate a genuine interest in their concerns and validate their feelings, even in cases of disagreement. - Additionally, select your words thoughtfully, employing neutral language to prevent accusatory or inflammatory remarks.

Handling emotions in a conflict, especially with someone in authority, can feel like trying to calm a storm inside. I've learned that it's crucial not to let that initial surge of fear, anger, or frustration take the wheel. Reacting in the heat of the moment often just adds fuel to the fire. I find it helpful to take a step back, maybe even take a deep breath or two. It's about giving yourself a moment to cool down and see the situation more clearly. Sometimes, I try to reframe the situation in my mind, looking for a positive angle or understanding the other person's perspective. It's amazing how a short break or a few calming words to yourself can change the entire dynamic of the conversation.

Taking moments to get away. It does not need to be solved at that moment. Sometimes quiet is good. And taking that time for introspection is optimum.

Whilst for some people the control of emotions is natural, allowing them to be focused and objective ( left brain dominated thinkers) for others it’s definitely not. Right brain dominated thinkers either compromise too easily leading them to feel frustrated they didn’t stand up for themselves or are able to more forcefully put their points across but only after getting angry. This does not lead to the best outcomes for either party. Can this be resolved? Yes by thinking like a left brain dominated thinker when preparing for the meeting and then practising assertive communication during the meeting. How? Use ‘I’ statements not ‘you’ statements.?

Managing your emotions is an important part of the process. Yet the real impact comes when you can enhance your perception of emotions in yourself and others, understand what's occurring, and use emotions judiciously. Bringing all four pieces of the jigsaw together is crucial.

The ability to empathise comes when you can see people clearly. That is only possible when the emotional charge has been dissolved. If you are still charged, then empathy is impossible. In order to let go, you must stop blaming, as engaging in blame means the other individual is responsible for how you feel. This is untrue, but if it seems true, it's because you have been caught up in a perceptual illusion. This illusion must be seen for what it is.

Great piece of advice I had from a mentor with regards to conflict with others is ‘what do you know? What should you know?’ - typically there are underlying reasons with yourself and the other person driving the conflict - this could be professional but often it’s something going on in their personal life you don’t yet know about. If you invest time reflecting on what you do know about them, building the relationship based on this, and importantly showing empathy - asking open questions which allow them to provide the missing context on what’s driving the conflict. Common understanding can often quickly diffuse the situation.

When we acknowledge that each person in an organization is human and dealing with all of life's issues, just like we are, it becomes a little easier to be objective about the conflict we are navigating. Taking this approach will help the search for reasonable and likely solutions or next steps.

When engaging with those in power, empathy is a vital tool. It allows us to see the situation through their eyes and understand the pressures unique to their position. This understanding can transform a contentious interaction into a constructive dialogue. Active listening is at the core of demonstrating empathy. It involves giving full attention, nodding in understanding, and summarizing their points to confirm your comprehension. Such actions show respect for their perspective and pave the way for genuine communication. Acknowledging their challenges and responsibilities can also help. By asking thoughtful, open-ended questions, we encourage a deeper conversation that can lead to mutual understanding and collaborative solutions.

Demonstrar interesse genuíno na perspectiva da outra pessoa constrói empatia, estabelecendo as bases para uma resolu??o colaborativa. Aceitar feedback sem defensividade é crucial para manter o diálogo aberto, mesmo quando as críticas s?o difíceis de aceitar. Esclarecer expectativas durante a conversa de feedback ajuda a evitar mal-entendidos e ambiguidades, garantindo que ambas as partes tenham uma compreens?o clara das preocupa??es.

Communicate assertively with a person in power is not easy for everyone. A few points to remember: 1. Be Clear and Direct: - Clearly express your thoughts and needs without being vague or ambiguous. - Avoid unnecessary qualifiers that may dilute your message. 2. Use "I" Statements: to take ownership of your thoughts and feelings. This can make your communication more about expressing your perspective rather than assigning blame.

Communicating assertively must be done at the emotional level and once again without any charge. If you are angry, upset or aggressive, your words will be heard from the foundation of those emotions. Let go of making things personal by setting a firm intention to discover the truth about the situation.

Do not hold back honesty in order to spare the other person's feelings. It can add to confusion about what you are actually saying. Be clear, firm, and as neutral as possible.

Using "I" statements and being clear about expectations can contribute to effective collaboration. In the context of HR, assertive communication can be particularly valuable when addressing issues, negotiating terms, or providing constructive feedback.

La asertividad nos permite defender nuestros valores y puntos de vista con educación y firmeza. Lamentablemente hay personas que en vez de asertividad utilizan la agresividad que, nuevamente, hace que perdamos la razón. Una comunicación agresiva solo conduce a que tu interlocutor se preocupa más de defenderse que de escucharte.

In my hospitality career, I’ve learned that seeking feedback and embracing experiential learning are cornerstones of growth. Every guest interaction, event coordination, or team collaboration has been a lesson in service excellence. Actively asking for feedback opens doors to innovations and personal development, while hands-on experiences solidify theoretical knowledge. This collaborative approach has shaped my professional journey, ensuring continuous improvement and a culture of excellence that resonates across all touchpoints of guest experience.

Initially, we will feel uncomfortable when receiving feedbacks but when we practice giving feedbacks to others, we will receive it better. I personally believe in receiving and giving feedbacks as it is so valuable when it is practised in the right way.

What could be useful is to ask ourselves: 1. What is the 1st, 2nd and 3rd outcome that I would like to achieve from this conversation? 2. If possible and appropriate, ask the other party: What could I have done better to navigate this conversation with you successfully? 3. What will I do differently the next time I need to have a similar conflict conversation?

Post-conflict, seeking feedback is invaluable. It's a chance to enhance your EQ and conflict resolution abilities. Ask for their views, listen to suggestions, and express gratitude for their input. Applying these insights improves future interactions, especially with those in power. This practice, aligned with the 6 Seconds philosophy, not only betters your skills but also strengthens professional relationships.

La rétroaction doit être faite de manière honnête et neutre et sans vous juger personnellement. Si vous sentez que ce sont plut?t des remarques et qu’elles n’ont pas de visées constructives, sachez également verbaliser que vous attendez des éléments factuels à même de vous faire progresser mais pas autre chose. Il faut garder en tête que donner du feed-back n’est pas un exercice facile et que certaines personnes ne savent pas qu’elles ne savent pas le faire correctement. Faites preuve de tact dans ce cas là et ne prenez que ce que vous jugez utile et pertinent.

Always follow up after every communication in order to solidify your position and deliverable. It also helps you build stronger interpersonal connections

In an ideal scenario, conflicts end with apologies and a seamless resolution. However, real life isn’t always so tidy. Conflicts might not be immediately resolved, leaving residual hurt that can affect future collaboration. It’s human nature – emotions accompany us to work. Upholding authenticity over conforming is paramount (in my opinion.) If needing time to cool off despite receiving an apology feels authentic, it is the appropriate response. Expecting emotional suppression is the antithesis of emotional intelligence.

Continuity in communication with team members is a game-changer. It drives real understanding, collaboration, and innovation. Always reach back around to others to make sure you are moving forward and on to improved outcomes and team dynamics.

This is the hard bit isn't it? Especially if you "almost" got to the conflict phase. This is about still chatting with the boss by the elevator, refraining from getting back to your bone of contention. This is about asking for 15 min of their time, getting it in their calendar, and coming with your own progress to show you've done your bit. This about genuinely asking: so, what next? And figuring it out together, not just you, not just them.

Especially with people in power, it's worth it to show that the follow up is not based on fear or admiration, but on self-awereness respect and professionalism. No matter what the conflict was about and who was "right or wrong" (usually it takes two to tango), remember that no one is perfect and it's ok to come out of a conflict with your head high, not feeling less or more about yourself, but simply carry on professionally.

Try to build trust by walking the talk, make your intentions clear and respect the other person’s emotions. Do not engage in loose talk, rather be straight in expressing your point of view in a very transparent way. Sometimes there are personality differences which cannot be changed, in such cases it will be better to keep the relationship task focused, maintain your work ethic and have a workable business relationship. In all this your emotional strength, poise and your belief in your own capability to deal with such people and situations has to be paramount.

I am a former radio broadcaster and am presently a voice coach and vocal trainer. I want to add that perspective to this chat. There are 2 things to remember when there is a conflict in conversation: 1. Your facial gestures always precede your words. Facial gestures happen in a nano-second, far faster than we can formulate our words. Our audience will always remember and believe the gestures. Always! 2. 90% of conflict is due to our tone of voice. Only 10% is due to conflicting opinions or ideas. Remember to check you tone. As an added thought: your facial gestures will determine your true tone of voice. So, if you are trying to resolve a conflict, calm down, put the feeling you want in your eyes, and soothe your tone. You'll be surprised!

I think resolving conflict in a healthy manner is as much about emotional intelligence as it is about communicating with confidence. I think physiological safety is an essential component and if so I would use my ABC model. Acceptance - An acceptance by both or all parties that conflict has arisen. Too many teams/companies try to bury their head in the sand. The earlier a problem is addressed, the greater the percentage of a positive outcome Behavior - What behaviors lead to the conflict and why? What behaviors are needed to resolve the conflict and how? Commitment - A commitment from all parties involved to learn from, grow from and most importantly move on from a period of conflict.

Avoid the conflict in the first place by proactively managing stakeholders. Share clear info in advance in a format they prefer and don’t seek to get them to position themselves to either agree or disagree. Alongside this start by influencing those who work with them so it’s not a personal approach but something they may hear from a few voices. This makes eventual influencing much easier as there is time to diffuse challenge or disagreement and seek solutions that compromise for both but still grow in a positive direction. Unless of course they are a saboteur who may feed on any negative energy and in those circumstances I’d recommend finding alternative people to work with and not feed more opportunities to be in conflict.

We tend to think of power is a limited resource. The other person has 100 "units" of power - so if I step on their toes, I am threatening or stealing their "units." Change this perspective by thinking of power as a regenerative and dynamic resource - like the seeds that can produce an infinite amount of new plants. How can you grow your power while simultaneously creating a win for the other side of the conflict? Where is a creative win-win solution? How can you grow together?