What do you do if your nonverbal cues are hindering your professional relationships?

1 Identify your nonverbal habits

The first step is to become more aware of your own nonverbal behavior and how it may be interpreted by others. You can do this by observing yourself in different situations, such as meetings, presentations, negotiations, or feedback sessions. You can also ask for honest feedback from someone you trust, or record yourself on video and review it later. Pay attention to your posture, eye contact, facial expressions, gestures, tone of voice, and use of space. Do they match your verbal message and your intention? Do they convey confidence, respect, interest, and openness? Or do they suggest boredom, impatience, defensiveness, or hostility?

2 Adapt to the context and culture

The second step is to adapt your nonverbal cues to the specific context and culture of your professional interactions. Different situations may require different levels of formality, intimacy, and assertiveness. For example, you may need to maintain more eye contact and use more gestures when giving a presentation than when listening to someone else. Similarly, different cultures may have different norms and expectations for nonverbal communication. For example, some cultures may value more physical proximity and touch than others. Some may consider direct eye contact as a sign of respect, while others may see it as a challenge or a threat. You can avoid misunderstandings and conflicts by researching the cultural preferences of your audience and adjusting your nonverbal cues accordingly.

3 Align your nonverbal and verbal communication

The third step is to align your nonverbal and verbal communication, so that they reinforce each other and convey a consistent message. If there is a mismatch between what you say and how you say it, your listeners may doubt your sincerity, credibility, or competence. For example, if you say that you are confident and enthusiastic about a project, but your body language shows nervousness and hesitation, your listeners may not trust you or support you. To align your nonverbal and verbal communication, you need to practice expressing your thoughts and feelings with clarity and conviction, and using nonverbal cues that match your words and tone.

4 Monitor and respond to others' nonverbal cues

The fourth step is to monitor and respond to others' nonverbal cues, so that you can build rapport, empathy, and trust with them. You can do this by paying attention to their body language, facial expressions, eye contact, tone of voice, and gestures, and interpreting them in the context and culture of the interaction. You can also use nonverbal cues to show that you are listening, understanding, and respecting them. For example, you can nod your head, smile, lean forward, and mirror their posture and gestures to show interest and agreement. You can also use nonverbal cues to regulate the flow of the conversation, such as raising your hand, looking away, or moving back to indicate that you want to speak, pause, or end the interaction.

5 Seek feedback and improve your skills

The fifth step is to seek feedback and improve your skills in nonverbal communication. You can do this by asking for constructive criticism from your colleagues, clients, or managers, and by evaluating your own performance and progress. You can also learn from other people who are good at nonverbal communication, such as mentors, role models, or coaches. You can observe how they use nonverbal cues to enhance their verbal communication, and how they adapt to different situations and cultures. You can also practice your nonverbal skills in various scenarios, such as role-playing, simulations, or mock interviews. You can also use online resources, such as books, videos, podcasts, or courses, to learn more about the theory and practice of nonverbal communication.

6 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?