What do you do if your emotional intelligence is lacking in professional relationships?

1 Assess your EI level

The first step to improving your EI is to know where you stand. You can use online tools, such as the Emotional Intelligence Test or the Emotional Quotient Inventory, to measure your EI skills and identify your strengths and weaknesses. Alternatively, you can ask for feedback from your colleagues, managers, mentors, or coaches, and listen to their perspectives on how you handle emotions at work. Be open to constructive criticism and avoid being defensive or dismissive.

2 Learn from others

One of the best ways to develop your EI is to observe and learn from others who demonstrate high EI. Pay attention to how they express their emotions, empathize with others, adapt to different situations, and deal with challenges. Try to emulate their behaviors and attitudes in your own interactions. You can also seek their advice and guidance on how to improve your EI skills and overcome your blind spots.

3 Practice mindfulness

Mindfulness is the practice of being aware of your present moment experience, without judgment or distraction. It can help you improve your EI by enhancing your self-awareness, self-regulation, and emotional balance. You can practice mindfulness by meditating, breathing deeply, journaling, or doing other activities that calm your mind and body. By being more mindful, you can recognize and manage your emotions more effectively, and respond to others more appropriately.

4 Express yourself clearly

Communication is a key component of EI, and it involves not only what you say, but also how you say it. To communicate with EI, you need to express yourself clearly, respectfully, and assertively, without being aggressive or passive. You also need to use nonverbal cues, such as eye contact, facial expressions, and body language, to convey your message and emotions. Additionally, you need to avoid emotional triggers, such as blaming, accusing, or insulting, that can escalate conflicts or hurt others.

5 Listen actively

Another aspect of communication that requires EI is listening. Listening is not just hearing what others say, but also understanding what they mean and how they feel. To listen with EI, you need to pay attention, ask questions, reflect back, and show empathy. You also need to avoid interrupting, judging, or dismissing what others say, and acknowledge their emotions and perspectives. By listening actively, you can build rapport, trust, and respect with others.

6 Seek feedback and improvement

The final tip to improve your EI is to seek feedback and improvement regularly. You can ask for feedback from your professional network, such as your colleagues, managers, mentors, or coaches, and use it to identify your areas of improvement and set goals. You can also seek improvement by reading books, taking courses, joining workshops, or hiring a coach that can help you enhance your EI skills and knowledge. By seeking feedback and improvement, you can monitor your progress and keep learning and growing.