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What do you do if your efforts to build strong relationships with team members are not yielding results?

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Building strong relationships within a team is pivotal for effective team facilitation, especially mid-career when you're expected to leverage interpersonal skills to foster a collaborative environment. If you find that despite your best efforts, the camaraderie and trust within your team aren't deepening, it's crucial to reassess your strategies. You might be facing unique group dynamics or individual challenges that require a different approach. This article will guide you through some steps to take when your relationship-building efforts seem to stall, ensuring you can navigate through this common mid-career challenge.

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Olga Mukhina (She/Her)

Global Leadership Consultant | High-Performing Teams Coach | Inclusive Leadership Expert | Facilitator | Speaker |…
Arunava D.

Vice President, Corporate Risk, Wells Fargo | Regulatory Compliance / Operations / Risk | LinkedIn Top Voice | views…

1 Reflect First

Before diving into new strategies, take a moment to reflect on your current efforts. Are you truly listening to your team members and understanding their perspectives? Sometimes, what seems like resistance is actually a misunderstanding or a lack of clear communication. Ensure that you're not only expressing your own expectations and goals but also actively seeking and valuing the input and feedback from your team. Reflection can often reveal gaps in understanding that, once addressed, pave the way for stronger relationships.

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Olga Mukhina (She/Her)

Global Leadership Consultant | High-Performing Teams Coach | Inclusive Leadership Expert | Facilitator | Speaker | Empowering Leaders to Thrive in Dynamic, Multicultural Environment
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When joining a new team, you need to remember that building trust takes time. However, you still need to continue your work: demonstrating your respect and sincere interest to a new team, culture and people working there. In addition, don't be shy to ask questions about people's needs, new culture norms, and seek for feedback. One of my friends moved to Middle East as a Head of regional operations of an American company. She was the only European, the only woman and the youngest team member. Imagine all the challenges she had especially in the beginning of her assignment. But she was clear about her expectations in terms of team performance, asked questions about the local culture and learn at least some words in Arabic that helped a lot!

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Adele Bradley BA (Hons)

Accomplished organisational development leader driving growth and employee engagement //Transformational Exec Leadership Coach ILM7 // Thought Leader // Published Author // Culture, Purpose & Transformation Leader
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What’s your approach been like? How self aware are you? Have you had 121s and asked for feedback? Are you approachable? What’s going on with the team that they aren’t engaging?

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Pedro A.

Subgerente de Seguridad e Higiene
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Para construir un equipo nuevo es necesario saber que quieres de cada uno para llegar a la meta específica. Ahora sí tu llegas a uno como lider tendrás que ser capaz de visualizar las fortalezas y debilidades para encontrar una oportunidad y minimizar las posibles amenazas.

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2 Seek Feedback

Engage directly with your team and solicit honest feedback about your leadership and facilitation style. This can be done through one-on-one meetings or anonymous surveys. Understanding how your actions are perceived can be eye-opening and provide you with valuable insights into what might be hindering stronger connections. Be open to criticism and ready to make changes based on what you learn. Remember, facilitating a team is about adapting to the needs of the group, not just implementing a fixed leadership style.

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Adele Bradley BA (Hons)

Accomplished organisational development leader driving growth and employee engagement //Transformational Exec Leadership Coach ILM7 // Thought Leader // Published Author // Culture, Purpose & Transformation Leader
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There is something missing in the equation, either lack of trust, disinterest, low engagement. What is your leadership style and how have you been trying to engage with them? Is it like trying to feed a vegan a burger? Have you asked?

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3 Adjust Approach

After reflecting and gathering feedback, it may become apparent that you need to adjust your approach. Consider whether your communication style aligns with the preferences of your team members. For example, some individuals may prefer more direct and frequent check-ins, while others thrive with more autonomy. Tailoring your style to suit the team can demonstrate that you value their working preferences and are willing to adapt for the benefit of the group.

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4 Build Trust

Trust is the foundation of any strong relationship, and it's built over time through consistent, reliable actions. Make sure you're following through on promises and showing up for your team. When team members feel they can rely on you, they're more likely to open up and invest in building a relationship. Additionally, being transparent about decision-making processes and acknowledging your own mistakes can foster trust and respect within the team.

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Pedro A.

Subgerente de Seguridad e Higiene
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La confianza con los equipos es fundamental ya que con esta se construyen lazos inquebrantables entre dos o más personas, los cuales se podrán ver a los ojos y decir su opinión e inclusive dar una solución por experiencias adquiridas sin que esto merme la relación en el organigrama.

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5 Personalize Interaction

Remember that each team member is an individual with unique motivations and communication styles. Take the time to understand these individual differences and personalize your interactions. This could mean recognizing their achievements in a way that resonates with them or providing support tailored to their personal development goals. Personalized attention can make team members feel valued and understood, which is crucial for deepening relationships.

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6 Patience and Persistence

Finally, remember that building relationships is a process that doesn't happen overnight. It requires patience, persistence, and a willingness to continually adapt your strategies. Keep trying new approaches and stay committed to the goal of creating a cohesive and supportive team environment. With time and effort, you'll likely find that the strong relationships you've been working towards will begin to form.

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Arunava D.

Vice President, Corporate Risk, Wells Fargo | Regulatory Compliance / Operations / Risk | LinkedIn Top Voice | views expressed are personal
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Building strong relationships takes time. Be patient and persistent. Consistently invest in relationship-building, even when immediate results aren’t visible.

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Pedro A.

Subgerente de Seguridad e Higiene
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Este punto es como en muchos casos en la vida propia, cada gota en la roca terminará por desgastarla, justo eso tenemos que hacer con los equipos ser fuertes de mente, perseverantes y lo más importante dedicarle tiempo de calidad a cada miembro del equipo.

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7 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?

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Arunava D.

Vice President, Corporate Risk, Wells Fargo | Regulatory Compliance / Operations / Risk | LinkedIn Top Voice | views expressed are personal
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Demonstrate vulnerability and authenticity with your team. Be genuine and transparent. Share your own challenges and learning experiences. When you make a mistake, admit it. Apologize and learn from it.

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What do you do if your efforts to build strong relationships with team members are not yielding results?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Reflect First

2 Seek Feedback

3 Adjust Approach

4 Build Trust

5 Personalize Interaction

6 Patience and Persistence

7 Here’s what else to consider

Team Facilitation

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What do you do if your efforts to build strong relationships with team members are not yielding results?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Reflect First

2 Seek Feedback

3 Adjust Approach

4 Build Trust

5 Personalize Interaction

6 Patience and Persistence

7 Here’s what else to consider

Team Facilitation

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