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What do you do if your colleagues are resistant to building strong relationships with you?

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Facing resistance from colleagues can be disheartening, especially when you're eager to build strong working relationships. It's a common scenario in the workplace, and navigating it requires a blend of empathy, strategic communication, and sometimes, a bit of patience. The key is not to take the resistance personally but to understand the underlying reasons and adapt your approach accordingly. Whether it's due to differing work styles, past misunderstandings, or simply a clash of personalities, there are constructive ways to address the issue and foster a more collaborative environment.

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Haymanot Reta Woldemichael

Senior Protection Assistant at UNHCR, the UN Refugee Agency
Farias Souza, BOARD

LinkedIn Top Voice | Chairman | Board of Directors | Advisory Board Member | CEO | President | Lifelong Learner |…
Maiya Litvina ??

???????? ?????? ???????? ?? ?????? ?? ?????????????? Recruiting agency IT and Digital | Career Consultant?? 5500+…

1 Assess Intent

Before jumping to conclusions about your colleagues' resistance, take a moment to assess their intent. It's possible that what you perceive as resistance might be a result of stress, workload, or even different communication styles. Approach the situation with an open mind and consider that their behavior may not be about you personally. Engaging in self-reflection can also help you understand if your own actions may have inadvertently contributed to the situation. By evaluating both sides, you can gain a clearer picture and tailor your approach to bridge the gap.

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Farias Souza, BOARD

LinkedIn Top Voice | Chairman | Board of Directors | Advisory Board Member | CEO | President | Lifelong Learner | Investor & Entrepreneur | Growth & Innovation | Startup Curator | ESG Passionate
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"Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again." - Nelson Mandela ?? Dive into a deep convo with pros on assessing intent. Seen resistance at work? Maybe it’s not what it looks like. Time for some perspective! ???? Keep an open heart. ?? Misunderstandings can often come from stress or miscommunication. Reflect on both sides before making a move. Could your actions play a part? Let’s aim for understanding, not assumptions. Ready to bridge that gap? ????

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Maiya Litvina ??

???????? ?????? ???????? ?? ?????? ?? ?????????????? Recruiting agency IT and Digital | Career Consultant?? 5500+ closed IT jobs | ??????+ ???????????????? ?????????????? ?? IT recruiting, HR consulting, HR manager
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In addition to assessing intent, try initiating a constructive dialogue. Use this opportunity to express your observations without assigning blame. For instance, you could say, "I've noticed some hesitation regarding the project, and I'm wondering if there are concerns or challenges I might not be aware of." This opens the door for honest exchange and mutual understanding. Also, be prepared to listen actively and empathetically to their feedback, as this can foster a more collaborative environment. Demonstrating willingness to understand and address their concerns can significantly reduce resistance and improve teamwork.

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2 Open Dialogue

Initiating an open dialogue is a crucial step towards understanding your colleagues' perspectives. Approach them in a non-confrontational manner, expressing your intent to work well together and seeking to understand their point of view. Listen actively to their concerns and be prepared to discuss any issues that may have arisen in the past. This conversation can serve as a foundation for building mutual respect and finding common ground. Remember, effective communication is about both speaking and listening, so give them space to voice their thoughts.

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Kenyatta Garner

Senior Advisor
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In my experience I found that just introducing yourself and talking about work makes for great conversation and leads to more positive interactions with anyone keeping it simple is the best course

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3 Find Commonality

Discovering common interests or goals can be the key to breaking down barriers. Look for aspects of your work or personal interests that align with those of your colleagues. This could be a shared commitment to a project's success, similar hobbies outside of work, or mutual professional aspirations. By focusing on these commonalities, you can create a sense of camaraderie and shared purpose. This doesn't mean forcing a connection; it's about naturally finding points of intersection that can lead to stronger working relationships.

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Haymanot Reta Woldemichael

Senior Protection Assistant at UNHCR, the UN Refugee Agency
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The key is to understand that building relationship in work place is like building a relationship in any other places. It takes time to build trust. It is also about chemistry. Not everyone is your cup of tea and vise versa. I used to rush things in work place, used to share too much sometimes, expect a lot from others etc. And in time I learn you might not be able to have the best of friends at work place and that is perfectly okay. If you have one work bestie you are the lucky one. If you are able to tolerate most of the colleagues that is also a success. Just be respectful and keep your expectations in check. And always remember you are there to work not to make friends. Find a mutual respect with everyone to be able cooperate.

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4 Offer Support

One of the most effective ways to build rapport with resistant colleagues is to offer your support. Show genuine interest in their work and offer assistance when appropriate. This doesn't mean overstepping boundaries but rather demonstrating that you're a team player and that you value their contribution. By being helpful and showing that you're invested in the team's success, you can slowly change the dynamic and encourage a more open attitude towards collaboration.

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5 Respect Boundaries

Understanding and respecting personal boundaries is essential when dealing with resistance. Recognize that not everyone is comfortable with the same level of closeness in professional relationships. Pay attention to cues that indicate how much interaction your colleagues prefer and respect their limits. By doing so, you create a respectful environment where everyone feels comfortable. Over time, as trust builds, your colleagues may become more open to strengthening the relationship.

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6 Maintain Professionalism

Throughout the process of trying to build relationships with resistant colleagues, it's important to maintain professionalism. Keep your interactions respectful and focused on work-related matters. Avoid gossip or negative talk about others, as this can further alienate your colleagues. By consistently demonstrating integrity and respect, you set a positive example and create an atmosphere that encourages others to do the same.

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7 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?

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Mona AlHebsi FCIPD, PMP, PCC

??LinkedIn’s Top Human Resources Voice ?? | Award-Winning HR Thought Leader??| Author ??? | Emiratization Advocate ???? | Career Coach & Counsellor ??
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If your colleagues are resistant to building strong relationships, it's important to approach the situation with empathy and patience. Try initiating conversations to understand their perspective and address any concerns they may have. Show genuine interest in their work and experiences. Offer your support and assistance where appropriate. Sometimes, it may take time for people to warm up to others, so be consistent in your efforts and remain professional. Additionally, consider seeking feedback from a supervisor or HR if the resistance persists, to explore possible underlying issues and find constructive solutions for improving teamwork and collaboration.

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What do you do if your colleagues are resistant to building strong relationships with you?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Assess Intent

2 Open Dialogue

3 Find Commonality

4 Offer Support

5 Respect Boundaries

6 Maintain Professionalism

7 Here’s what else to consider

Career Counseling

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What do you do if your colleagues are resistant to building strong relationships with you?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Assess Intent

2 Open Dialogue

3 Find Commonality

4 Offer Support

5 Respect Boundaries

6 Maintain Professionalism

7 Here’s what else to consider

Career Counseling

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