What do you do if your coaching client is resistant to change?

Building trust in someone who is resistant to change can be challenging Try to understand why the person is resistant to change. Listen to their concerns and try to see things from their point of view. Communication is key in any relationship. Be clear, concise, and honest in your conversations and explain why the change is necessary Show the person that you understand how they feel about the change. Acknowledge their feelings and emphatize with them Try to build a rapport with the person by finding common ground, shared interests, and values. Be consistent in your actions and follow through on your promises and remember, building trust takes time and patience. Keep an open mind, be respectful, and stay committed to the relationship.

Covey's Emotional Bank Account model emphasizes the importance of making consistent deposits into the client's emotional bank account through understanding, empathy, and genuine support, thereby strengthening the relationship. By demonstrating that I'm invested in their well-being and success, I create a safe space for open communication. This trust enables us to explore the root of their resistance together, addressing concerns and fears constructively. Establishing this foundation of trust is crucial for facilitating a more receptive attitude towards change, as it assures the client that they're supported and understood throughout their journey of growth and transformation.

Trust can be built in different ways as well. You might "trust" someone who appears to have expertise and reviews, but that might not be enough. You might then consider your comfort level - do you relate on a personal level. And then, are their recommendations helpful and move you forward. All three of these areas will most likely cement a trust relationship, so consider the combination of factors that will help you build that bridge.

This forms the basis of every fruitful coaching partnership. Master the art of attentive listening, demonstrate genuine understanding, and exhibit unwavering patience when addressing your client's concerns. Building a strong sense of trust will make them more open to your guidance.

If a coaching client is resistant to change, it's essential to approach , Here are some steps you can take: 1. Explore the Resistance: Understand the underlying reasons for their resistance. It could be fear, lack of confidence, or uncertainty. 2.Build Trust: Strengthen your relationship with the client to create a safe space for them to open up about their concerns. 3.Set Realistic Goals: Break down the change into smaller, more manageable steps to make it less intimidating. 4.Provide Support: Offer encouragement, feedback, and resources to help them navigate the change process. 5.Reassess and Adjust: Regularly review progress and adjust the approach as needed to address any barriers to change.

When a coaching client is resistant to change, I make it a priority to understand their fears. We have open discussions where they can share what's making them hesitant. Often, they're scared of failing, the unknown, or leaving their comfort zone. Recognizing and talking about these fears helps us tackle them together. I aim to show empathy and support, assisting clients to see that change is manageable and that they have the strength to face it. This approach helps ease their fears and makes the idea of change feel less overwhelming.

Understand the limited belief they carry. It may be their past failures or feedback from their bosses that could have created the limited belief. By working with them by asking the right questions, it will help to understand their fears. Once we know that we can work further to remove the fear.

I heard this quote once and I don't have a reference for it - "everything you want is behind fear." If this is true, then it is fear that holds us back from anything. But usually it is not the specific stated fear that is the block. I'm known as a "nervous flyer." But really I don't have a fear of flying, I love flying. I just have a fear of falling out of the sky in a firey ball... Sometimes I will confront the fear head on: let's talk about the worst thing that could happen. Let's strategize some solutions if that does take place. In this way, you give your client the permission to live through it - and many times just doing that exercise can completely remove the block.

The key is in the questions you use. It's about bringing an energy of curiosity and empathy. For me it also goes beyond the fears, resisting change is a way of self-sabotage that stems from our beliefs and value system. Use techniques like reframing, belief system exploration, and values alignment.

‘You can not expect different results by doing the same thing over and over again.’ Ask about the reason for the resistance to change. Is it fear or something else? If the fear seems real, think through it and devise solutions that may work. Convey the ideas to your coachee. If it seems unreal, encourage seeking therapy. Mention that the given goal can not be reached without making changes. Mention that the client is in coaching because the old ways were not working, and the new way will differ.

All coaching/mentoring is about setting audacious goals, outside the comfort zone. Beyond SMART, and PURE/CLEAR (Sir John Whitmore) or BHAG (JimCollins). Then it is working towards them with the coach/mentor. The goal should be aligned with the larger life purpose/northstar

I will usually take a "crawl, walk run" approach so that my clients can start with a baby step. For example, a client who is reluctant to delegate might need to start with a tiny task and work their way up to letting others do more.

Collaborate closely with your client to set goals that are both attainable and personally significant. This collaborative approach encourages a feeling of empowerment and minimises opposition.

Transmitir al cliente el valor de los "peque?os pasos" dados con seguridad, acompa?ado. Ese paso es el que lo saca del lugar en el que está hasta fortalecer el músculo de confianza. En ocasiones, el exceso de formalismo y metas desafiantes hace que se pierda una gran oportunidad de cambio.

Coaching is all about knowing your goals and setting them in right way. you cannot proceed productively if you haven't spent right time towards setting your goals. Indeed, they have to be smart goals, but also discussed and agreed in a right way. Once you set the goals, always put in interactions to feedback, review and share ideas to keep them aligned and support each other towards success.

As a coach, I will approach this differently. I am not in the client’s shoes and what I see as a benefit, may not be a benefit to them. Same as I cannot assume what their core values are. Through coaching and working with the client as their thinking partner, I will help them identify what the benefits may be based on their personal values. Let me give a simple example: say the client has been offered a promotion. To one person this may be entirely beneficial but to someone who values their time more than money it may cause resistance. Of course, this is a very simple example and often there are underlying reasons for the resistance that may not even be obvious to them which are revealed through non-judgmental coaching.

This may sound silly, but when I do a profit projection with a client, I will often ask "what are you going to do with this extra money?" It's not a sales tool for my services, it's about them getting to tangibly see the benefit for the hard work.

Communicating the benefits of change is crucial in helping clients overcome resistance. By highlighting how the change aligns with their values and long-term goals, you can inspire them to see the positive outcomes that lie ahead. Using positive language and framing the change as an opportunity for growth can also make it more appealing. Ultimately, when clients understand the benefits and see the potential for positive change, they are more likely to embrace it and take action.

The really important part is here is - make sure it is the benefits that your coaching client has identified themselves & not ones you impose on them. Otherwise they will not see them as benefits. Ask open questions to help them identify tangible benefits & ask them what it will feel like to realise those benefits. A powerful approach can be to get them on their feet & build a positive future for themselves - use ‘stepping stones’ that they cross to get to the benefit that represent actions & how they will feel along the way. Also ask them to reflect on previous challenges they have faced & how they realised the benefits then. Help them to create actions that you can hold them to account for so they know they have your support.

Even if trust has been built and we share good rapport also until we share the key takeaways or the benefits clients interest can't be developed. It's important to highlight all positive attributes and benefits that one shall yield at the end of the process.

Engaging in a coaching process can be frightening. Resistance is a natural reaction against fear. I usually tell them how I started with being coached, and how I was reluctant and fearful. That usually helps tremendously. The most important part is not to be pushy but to be compassionate and understanding. When clients feel understood and loved, they usually open up easier. I also sometimes offer a break or a lower pace to move on.

It goes without saying that the support framework during the whole journey is very important. We usually focus too much on process, and our own thoughts in such discussions that we forget to address support elements. Again, this support can be technology, process ease, mental or emotional. So as a Coach you have to be aware or create a safe environment where anyone can seek your support when needed.

Offering support is indeed crucial when dealing with resistance. By being a source of encouragement and providing practical tools, you can help your client navigate the change process more effectively. Your support can make a significant difference in their ability to overcome obstacles and move forward with confidence.

When there is strong inertia, take the path of least resistance. If you want the client to learn swimming by jumping into the deep end, that will hardly work. There are many reasons why a client resists change e.g. fear, laziness, can’t connect change to their purpose. Work with the client on the path of least resistance and explore suitable habits to maintain momentum. A tip: Contrary to my swimming analogy, I sometimes challenge client to do something outrageous and ‘impossible’ to them. When they refuse, I said to counter offer, and they usually will propose something acceptable to them along the same line. I’m not forcing them to jump into deep end, I’m giving them a chance to choose, but within the scope of ‘the pool’. Try it!

If your current approach is not yielding the desired results, it may be beneficial to remain open-minded and adjust your strategies accordingly. Experiment with various exercises, communication styles, or resources to discover what truly connects with your client.

There's no one size fits all in coaching. One needs to understand the clients needs and their capabilities based on factors like age, profession, location, health conditions, and so many other factors. As a coach I always make it a point to create strategies based on the clients needs, keep track of their progress, ask for feedback and revise the plan as we go further.

Strategies are an interesting perspective. Instinctive, prescriptive or researched approaches all generate inertia that facilitates the clients energy towards future proofing. Having discussions that exchange ideas related to values and "want" alignment to the ultimate next step; making the decision for direction and immediate next step/s to be undertaken, that agitates activity and a toward mindset.

Every individual has a natural tendency to want to keep the status quo. Helping a client become aware of this tendency is the first step towards helping him/her move towards change. It's usually the voice of the saboteur that tries to get in the way of change and it's always helpful to help the client call it out. Then helping the client visualise what becomes possible and available after the change can create resonance that could bring down some of the resistance. Above all the coach needs to have the patience to hold a safe space for the client thoughout the process.

I find empathy is very powerful—it validates their feelings and shows that you’re not just a coach, but a partner in their growth. Finding common ground lays the foundation for a deeper connection, making the path to change less daunting. As others have already said, also explore why they are resisting this specific change. It may uncover more limiting beliefs that need to be addressed first.

I have three very strong beliefs that help support my clients on this: 1- It starts with me believing that my client can change, if I doubt their capabilities I am passing that energy to my client. 2- everyone's journey is different, which requires me to be flexible and adjust my approach per person. 3- my client deserves the best of me, and that's why I ensure that I keep working on myself and that I am focused on the 100%. If I can't give them the best, I need to reschedule. I have a routine I follow to prepare for my sessions and center myself.

In my experience people do not resist change. They have un-communicated concerns that are not yet voiced or heard. When I see resistance to change I am the one resisting and have to discover what I am holding on to that has me be stuck and ineffective with others.

Change is where growth happens, so I would first understand what the client wants to achieve in the session, and engagement. Clients might have tried to change, but weren’t successful in their approach. What I learned in NLP and bring to my coaching practice is the different levels of change, which range from the surrounding environment to our purpose in life. Knowing the client, designing a specific goal and deciding on applicable small steps, formulate the approaches to acknowledge and recognize the changes - no matter how big or small. As coaches, we support, guide, and create a safe space so that our clients re-gain the confidence they want to change.