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What do you do if you receive feedback laced with insults and hostility?

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Receiving feedback, even when it's negative, is a crucial part of professional growth. However, when that feedback comes with a side of insults and hostility, it can be challenging to handle. You might feel attacked or demoralized, but it's important to navigate these situations with poise and professionalism. By doing so, you can maintain your dignity and potentially extract any useful insights from the feedback, no matter how poorly delivered.

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Prashant Rao

Chief Business Operations | Certified Independent Director for Board Governance
Sailesh JV

Business Leader with experience in Digital Sales, Client Servicing, End-To-End Sales Management, Account Management…
Alex Kent

Helping business leaders accomplish the extraordinary.

1 个答复

1 Stay Calm

When faced with hostile feedback, your first instinct might be to react emotionally. Instead, take a deep breath and strive to remain calm. Acknowledge your initial feelings, but don't let them dictate your response. By staying composed, you give yourself the chance to process the information objectively. This approach can help you to separate the useful content of the feedback from the unnecessary insults, allowing you to focus on any constructive criticism that may be hidden within.

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Prashant Rao

Chief Business Operations | Certified Independent Director for Board Governance
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A culture that believes in and practices grooming, mentoring and creativity coupled with an environment of learning; a hostile feedback is generally absent. However, in a situation like this, first thing to understand is the feedback is on the task performed and doesn’t determine ones personality or character. So, do not take it personally, instead look at it professionally and analyse how can you do better by comprehending the issue and not analysing the wrath or hostility.

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Sailesh JV

Business Leader with experience in Digital Sales, Client Servicing, End-To-End Sales Management, Account Management, X-Functional Collaboration, Setting up & Scaling Processes|Ex-LinkedIn, Google, Meta
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Normally, in a good working environment, you don't get to experience something like this. Feedback given should normally be an area for improvement. However, if you're receiving feedback full of insults/hostility, something is seriously wrong. Try to understand the reason. Is it something personal? Have you triggered something without knowledge or intention? If you are able to figure it out, take steps to fix it. Having a candid conversation without losing your cool helps. The bottom line is it's all about respecting each other, whether at work or outside of work.

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2 Reflect First

Before responding to the feedback, take a moment to reflect on its content. Consider whether there is any truth to the points raised, despite the negative delivery. Self-reflection can help you identify areas for personal or professional development. It's also an opportunity to assess your own performance and behavior objectively, which is a valuable skill in any career.

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3 Respond Appropriately

Crafting an appropriate response to hostile feedback requires a balance of assertiveness and diplomacy. Acknowledge the feedback and express your willingness to improve, but also set boundaries if the language used was unacceptable. It's important to communicate that while you are open to constructive criticism, disrespectful or insulting remarks are not conducive to a professional environment.

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4 Seek Clarification

If the feedback is unclear or laced with insults, ask for clarification. This shows that you are engaged and willing to understand the other person's perspective, but it also gives them the opportunity to rephrase their comments in a more constructive manner. Seeking clarification not only helps you better understand the feedback but also steers the conversation towards a more professional tone.

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Alex Kent

Helping business leaders accomplish the extraordinary.
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It can be very easy to make assumptions about what you hear in the way of feedback. So consider asking clarifying questions. Some suggestions: “That’s interesting; tell me a bit more please” “What examples are there which would help me understand better what you are saying?” “That feedback doesn’t sound particularly constructive. What suggestions for change do you have?” “What would be an ideal outcome?

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5 Use It as Growth

Every piece of feedback, regardless of how it's delivered, is an opportunity for growth. Identify any valid points and use them to improve your skills or work processes. This proactive approach demonstrates resilience and a commitment to personal and professional development. By focusing on the potential for growth, you can turn even the most negative feedback into a positive learning experience.

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6 Move Forward

After processing the feedback and extracting any useful insights, it's time to move forward. Don't dwell on the negative emotions that may have arisen from the insults or hostility. Instead, focus on the actionable aspects of the feedback and how you can implement changes to better yourself and your work. Moving forward with a positive mindset will help you maintain professional relationships and keep your career trajectory on an upward path.

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7 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?

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Kripa S Koshy, MBA, MFA

Content & Media Leader | Expert in Digital Strategy, Video, Digital Marketing, Content to Commerce, Storytelling & Audience Growth, Revenue Optimisation | Ex-- NDTV, CNBC, Times, History (A+E), Marico, Skechers
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Negative emotions tied with feedback is simply unnecessary in the professional sphere. If this is someone you respect and want to maintain a good rapport, then try to look past the negativity to identify what exactly is causing them to feel that way. If they’re open to listening explain where your perspective and then in such a circumstance, a resolution is usually possible. If it’s someone who is generally disrespectful and just refuses to see your point of view take the feedback like you would any other piece of information. All information is knowledge worth considering. Even if it doesn’t seem like an accurate assessment of you, it is information about how the other person perceives the situation and you. That reveals a lot about them.

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What do you do if you receive feedback laced with insults and hostility?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Stay Calm

2 Reflect First

3 Respond Appropriately

4 Seek Clarification

5 Use It as Growth

6 Move Forward

7 Here’s what else to consider

Facilitation

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What do you do if you receive feedback laced with insults and hostility?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Stay Calm

2 Reflect First

3 Respond Appropriately

4 Seek Clarification

5 Use It as Growth

6 Move Forward

7 Here’s what else to consider

Facilitation

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感谢您的反馈

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