What do you do if parents are being difficult?

When engaging with difficult parents, the first step is always to listen and understand their concerns. Parents often express worry for their child's well-being, and it's vital to validate their feelings. This not only makes them feel seen and heard but also fosters a mutual collaboration essential for effectively teaching their children. Arranging a meeting in a neutral setting helps create a calm atmosphere for open dialogue. Employing active listening techniques—such as paraphrasing their points—demonstrates genuine engagement and respect for their perspectives. This approach significantly de-escalates tensions and sets a positive tone for constructive communication, building trust and a cooperative relationship moving forward.

“Once you show that you care, they will care about what you know”. I use this saying in all of my interactions with parents and as a parent myself, I remind myself of how I would like to be treated by school staff. There is a saying from Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg: “You do not need to be disagreeable in your disagreements”. So listening with your head and your heart is crucial to figuring how we can work together in support of their child. We should always to seek to understand before we seek to be understood and the way to do this is to listen with an intentional heart. Our heart’s intent is to empathize with the parent’s feelings and then strategize together how to meet their needs.

I would say if any job is the hardest on this planet that would be PARENTING. Every parent always wants best for their children, there is no doubt in that, but sometimes the way parents communicate with their children might be hurtful for their children. I would be interested in listening to their concerns and will ask them questions to know the root cause for instance, try to understand their past means how they were treated by their parents. It might be possible that their parenting style was influenced by their parents' parenting. I would also be asking if they are open for another options to improve their communication skills for e.g when they are in stress, what they can do to get their mind stable before they talk to their children.

Listen before speaking. Every parent wants to be heard. Stay calm using a soft voice after they have expressed their concerns. They are our students, but to the parents they are their everything.

When meeting with parents, hearing and listening to their concerns is important. Often people want someone to listen and acknowledge them. It is always helpful to start off with something positive and point out their child's strengths before diving into their concerns.

Always communicate clearly so there is no ambiguity because you want the meeting to end with no questions unanswered. A parent will feel that they were unheard.

When you communicate clearly, you should communicate in the manner of active listening as we learned in parts of no. 1 in this article. Active listening helps you to judge the mindset of your parents.

Communicate in a level that everyone can follow. If there is a language barrier find someone who can interpret for you. Have handouts so that when the parents have a moment they can read and review what you talked about.

The way I have parents set boundaries is by using the restorative practice of Circles. Once parents and students have agreed to this process, I begin by meeting with each of them separately. During these meeting, I share with them our opportunity to set our values for the Circle and our guidelines. The values are simple what we aspire to be in Circle and expect others to do the same in the space. The guidelines are the ‘Norms’ we create to ensure all members of the Circle feel safe to speak their truth and listen with their head and heart to others. Once we have agreed on this process, parents and students are brought together to support the overall Circle process. A talking piece allows each parent to speak without interruptions.

To set boundaries is the most important thing of good communication with difficult parents. Parents, which are difficult in communication, communicate with feelings, manners they have learned, word of wisdoms they picked up. The most important boundary to set is: we talk about the same thing, the same behaviours, … So: set boundaries!

Absolutely! It’s crucial to set clear roles and responsibilities document and make certain things clear to parents . There are certain areas which are nonnegotiable and parents should be clear about the fact that violation of those rules will lead to what consequences. For instance school timings , no violence on campus and zero tolerance on drug abuse

I think the triangle of communication should be well placed in the school . When resolving any issue in the school students should be made part of the decision in order to increase chances of success once student owns the decision it will positively impact his/ her/their learning

Solutionoffering is one of the most important things you can do in the conversation with difficult parents. Solutionoffering shows the parents, you are not Master Lempel, you are a teacher whom want to offer solutions in the wishes of the parents, whom hear the other side.

Parents want the best for their children. They want to empower their children with the best possibilities to achieve greatness. By providing guidance and possible solutions will put them at ease. Having parents as part of the equation is powerful.

Setting up a meeting with support staff can sometimes be a positive solution to angered parents. Make everyone involved aware of how the meeting will be handled and who will be attending. Letting the parents know upfront will alleviate any further anger and confusion.

Keeping a journal has been so helpful for me to reflect on my practice as an educator. Having time to think about what went wrong and what went right in my interactions with a parent is key to measuring the success or the failure of the interaction. The qualitative data I collect from my observations will help in future interactions and will give me a space to share how I felt from the interaction and what did I need moving forward.

Parents could be so demanding. However, it is normal because they paid already. They want to make sure we do the best. Here what you can consider when dealing with demanding parents ; I am answering this based on my own experiences, dealing with Asian parents, specifically Indonesian Parents. Let them be a part of the process. Learning process is a long way journey to go. They need to understand that they were a part of that journey as well when they were a kid. Let their kid enjoy the process and put them into the process as well. Every curriculum have their own best learning skills however kids are special. Kids have their own understanding of every lesson. This is something that most parents deny it. Let the kid enjoy the journey..

We can call parents demanding, but very often they are just being passionate. Whenever I would work with a parent who came in with a demanding tone I knew that we were going to be good. This signaled to me that they cared a lot about their child’s and were willing to fight for them, and so would I. This common ground meant that we could work together to support their, their child in meeting their learning goals and becoming a part of the school community, as well as build a strong school-home partnership.

Parents can be difficult, and they have the right be so if the norm has not already been established. Parents are seeking what is best for their child and it is important to remember that going in. I always like to give parents the ability to say what is on their mind at the start so they can lay their concerns down and allow us to see them individually. This gives us the ability to look at the concerns more proactively and collaborate on what they expect as well as what is a reasonable expectation to place on the teacher or district. Understandably this will not solve every conflict but will set the ground work for the future.