What are the best ways to handle the emotional impact of ending a mentoring relationship?

1 Acknowledge your feelings

The first step to dealing with the emotional impact of ending a mentoring relationship is to acknowledge and accept your feelings, whatever they may be. You may feel proud of your mentee's achievements, happy for their growth, or hopeful for their future. You may also feel sad, disappointed, angry, or betrayed by the end of the relationship, especially if it was unexpected or abrupt. Don't judge or suppress your emotions, but rather express them in a safe and appropriate way. You can talk to a trusted friend, colleague, or therapist, write in a journal, or engage in a creative or physical activity that helps you release your emotions.

2 Celebrate the success

Another way to handle the emotional impact of ending a mentoring relationship is to celebrate the success and accomplishments of both you and your mentee. You can reflect on the goals you set and achieved together, the challenges you overcame, the skills you learned, and the feedback you exchanged. You can also share your appreciation and gratitude for each other, and acknowledge the positive impact you had on each other's personal and professional development. You can celebrate the success in a formal or informal way, such as by sending a thank-you note, giving a gift, or having a farewell lunch.

3 Maintain the connection

Just because the mentoring relationship is over, it doesn't mean that you have to cut off all contact with your mentee or mentor. You can maintain the connection in a different and appropriate way, depending on your preferences and boundaries. You can stay in touch by email, phone, or social media, and check in on each other's progress and well-being. You can also offer or seek occasional advice, support, or feedback, as long as you respect each other's autonomy and privacy. You can also network and refer each other to new opportunities, or collaborate on projects or initiatives that align with your interests and values.

4 Learn from the experience

A final way to handle the emotional impact of ending a mentoring relationship is to learn from the experience and use it to grow and improve. You can evaluate the strengths and weaknesses of the mentoring relationship, and identify what worked well and what didn't. You can also solicit and provide constructive feedback to each other, and highlight the areas of improvement for both of you as mentors or mentees. You can also apply the lessons and insights you gained from the mentoring relationship to your current and future roles, goals, and challenges. You can also seek or offer new mentoring opportunities that suit your needs and aspirations.

Ending a mentoring relationship can be an emotional and challenging process, but it can also be an opportunity to celebrate, connect, learn, and grow. By following these tips, you can handle the emotional impact of ending a mentoring relationship in a healthy and constructive way, and move on with confidence and gratitude.

5 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?