How do you recognize peer supporters?

I was home off of a military assignment, before heading to Beruit in 83. During that time my 16 year old Brother was killed in a car wreck and I had to break the news to my Mom and Dad. I wasn't particularly close to my Brother, due to time away and an age difference but a it was obviously unspeakable pain and grief for my Mom and Dad. Over the years, people have STILL, approached me with "caution" when bringing up the issue, even 40 years later in a few days. I was never effected by it in the same way as my parents. I learned never to say: "I know how you feel". I realize that everyone's struggle is unique and personal to them. Empathy is a priceless character trait. Listening to understand versus hear is equally valuable.

Suffering has such a strong connotation and may cause us to overlook people who are in some sort of distress or unease. Defining words is do important for finding common ground and avoiding misunderstanding.

Empathy is a critical component to fostering psychological safety in the workplace and nurturing respectful and enriching peer relationships. Empathy is also a catalyst for compassion - an essential ingredient, but insufficient alone. Compassion goes one step further and asks of each of us, "What can you do right now to extend the support that is needed?" That may look like taking 15 minutes in your busy, stressful day to huddle with a peer and be a thought partner for a pressing challenge. It may look like proactively recognizing and celebrating a peer's accomplishments in a forum where they aren't going to advocate for themselves. Compassionate leadership among peers inspires and energizes.

My mother was diagnosed with cancer when I was 12 years old and she passed away when I was 20. For the majority of my life, I felt very alone in my experience, afraid of burdening friends with my pain and doubtful that anyone truly understand my lived experience. I knew people whose parents had passed away, but those people were older, their parents much older. When I finally discovered The Dinner Party, a platform for grieving 20-40 somethings to find peer community, I felt understood. I became a virtual host during the pandemic, and finally felt seen and heard by other daughters who understood the pain of anticipatory grief, the deep despair of loss, and the cyclical waves of bereavement. That connection opened a new door to my healing.

Knowing that you been there and done that will gain you a lot of respect they will be more open with you knowing you will not be judging them your story can save someone

Respect and trust in supporting others is extremely important. Peer supporters must always remember that, although they may have lived experience, we all interpret things differently, our thoughts and beliefs will be different, and none of us have the right to influence or coerce others into our ways of thinking. Unbiased, non judgemental and an ability to remove oneself from the situation to truly be there to listen and hear and embrace silence where needed.

In my opinion it is very important to neutral when supporting others. During the interaction, you are there as a person to encourage, support, and encourage. This means your political and religious views are not important. What is important is respecting and building the bond and trust with your peer.

I've learned, over the years, that the workplace can and should be a place for personal conversations and interactions. This enables you to build trust within your team and colleagues. When you invite someone to share their story, grief, or challenges, you are providing them a welcoming and supportive environment to do so. Listen to understand, don't criticize or judge, and pay thoughtful attention in order to determine the best response. Cliches, platitudes, and toxic optimism are never really helpful. Show empathy or sympathy (depending on what the situation calls for). Be present and offer your time. Sometimes, simply being available to listen is all someone needs to feel supported. And other times, be the advocate they need.