As an executive coach, you want to help your coachee achieve their goals and overcome their challenges. But how do you leverage their strengths and motivations to make the most of your coaching sessions? Here are some tips to guide you.
The first step is to identify what your coachee is good at and what they enjoy doing. You can use various tools and assessments, such as the StrengthsFinder, the VIA Character Strengths, or the CliftonStrengths, to help them discover their top strengths. Alternatively, you can ask them to reflect on their past successes, feedback, and passions. The goal is to help them recognize and appreciate their unique talents and abilities.
I have used many of those tools prior to coaching, and it's generally because the company provides me with that information. I find their greatest value is being able to start the conversation. I am also cautious about using any tool that "labels" who my client is. When I am coached (all coaches should have their own coach) I want my coach to deal with me, not my assessment. So, I usually show up "empty" with no pre-conceptions of who my client is or should be. That's what asking questions and listening is for.
Each of the assessments has value and merit. When developing a baseline of strengths, I use the power of conversation, observation, and questions rather than a test. Test results vary based on who shows up to take them and with what mindset that day. If I were taking a test, is my mindset that of a business owner focused on a breakthrough from a group coaching program yesterday - or - am I GG who is worried about my grandson's doctor's appointment this afternoon? Asking questions, listening to stories, and being observant about behavior can lead me to ideas, which guide my next questions around skills that the coachee literally lit up when talking about. We draw parallels and conclusions and the coachee sees the direct connections.
The next step is to align their goals with their strengths. This means helping them set SMART (specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound) goals that leverage their strengths and align with their values and purpose. For example, if your coachee is a great communicator and wants to improve their leadership skills, you can help them set a goal to deliver more presentations, mentor others, or join a networking group. By aligning their goals with their strengths, you can increase their motivation, confidence, and performance.
It depends. In some cases, we certainly want SMART goals attached to coaching. In others, my clients just want me to show up for them and not be some goaltender. So, it's circumstantial.
Before making external goals, let's look at the possible overlooked. Perhaps they are using their strengths in ways now that are moving them toward that goal, or there are opportunities to do so. In this example of improving their leadership skills - as a good communicator - let's take a look at their current/recent interactions. What were the scenarios, conversations, and outcomes? Can they look back and see where they had influence as a mentor, built connections, or presented ideas? Perhaps they can start being more intentional about doing more of those things closer to home vs making new external goals. If you do set goals, don't limit yourself to SMART - experiment with different goal-setting strategies. Shake it up!
The third step is to adapt your communication style to suit your coachee's personality and preferences. Different people have different ways of processing information, expressing emotions, and making decisions. You can use personality frameworks, such as the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), the DiSC, or the Enneagram, to understand your coachee's style and communicate accordingly. For example, if your coachee is an introvert, you can give them more time to think and reflect, use open-ended questions, and avoid interrupting them. If your coachee is an extrovert, you can engage them in more dialogue, use positive feedback, and encourage them to share their ideas.
I think these assessments can be valuable, but also a crutch. I will ask my client what approach works best for them. If they find value in an assessment tool, then we can use that. If they don't we don't. I will ask if they want to be held accountable or not. Some say, no, I can police myself, I don't need you to do that for me. I will let them know of my straightforward nature and find out just how direct they want me to be.
If adapting your communication style to your coachee is the third step in any process, it's coming in too late. This should be clearly recognized and discussed in the initial stages of the engagement - right there with setting and communicating expectations of the coach, coaches, and sessions. Ask specific questions and have conversations about how they process information, express themself, make decisions, and more. This lets them know that from the beginning you're listening and respect their communication style. Of course, you're going to learn more about them as the sessions progress and it may adapt. But by making it a priority at the beginning of the coaching you set the stage for better communication during all sessions.
The fourth step is to challenge your coachee to grow and develop their strengths further. This means helping them identify their learning opportunities, stretch assignments, and feedback sources that can help them enhance their skills and competencies. You can also use the GROW (goal, reality, options, and will) model to structure your coaching conversations and help them explore their options and commit to action. By challenging them to grow, you can foster their curiosity, resilience, and adaptability.
If they are coaching with me, they always want to "grow", but in what? It could be they are fine with where they are in their work but want to address a challenge with a sibling who is also in the business. (I get that a lot with family businesses). I help them think of the end in mind and work backward from there.
Growth is inherent in coaching. I use different coaches for different growth goals. Either to achieve a goal or to resolve a challenge, growth will happen. But growth doesn't always mean action. I've not had to challenge someone to grow. I've challenged them to rethink or reapproach a challenge. How they can translate their background to speak towards their next step. Sometimes coaching isn't about challenging them to take physical action, but rather to be curious, reflect, or rethink. A reflection can lead to a revelation (or release) that is as powerful - or more - than a physical action.
The fifth step is to celebrate your coachee's achievements and progress. This means acknowledging their efforts, results, and learnings, and providing them with positive reinforcement and recognition. You can also help them reflect on their successes and failures, and identify their key takeaways and areas for improvement. By celebrating their achievements, you can boost their morale, satisfaction, and self-efficacy.
Nothing is more valuable than sending them a hand-written note letting them know I am proud of their effort and achievement. Maybe along with a book I feel speaks to their issue.
Celebration in any form is best when it is meaningful to the individual. No matter what you do to celebrate your coachee, as long as it is genuine and comes from your heart, you can't go wrong.
The sixth and final step is to support your coachee's autonomy and ownership of their goals and actions. This means empowering them to make their own decisions, solve their own problems, and take responsibility for their outcomes. You can also help them develop their self-awareness, self-regulation, and self-motivation skills that can help them sustain their growth and performance. By supporting their autonomy, you can enhance their trust, engagement, and commitment.
This 'step' is entwined throughout the coaching engagement. > With each encouragement, you're building to this. > Each conversation highlighting growth is paving the way for this. > Each win is building their confidence to achieve this. This is the underlying path of coaching.
The goal of the coach is to allow the client to become their own hero! I use the coax, encourage, and inspire formula for doing just that!
A client is often more concerned about whether they can be a good coachee, than if you are a good coach. Knowing this, I have an upfront conversation about what their concerns are about being a coachee. Have they tried coaching before? Did it produce results? Have they been reluctant up to this point to try coaching, and if so, why? And, don't hesitate to ask your employer (if you have one) to help pay for some or all of your coaching. It's one of the best investments you will ever make in yourself!