How do you learn from feedback and improve your influence style?

It helps to begin by defining influence. Influence is the ability to inspire someone to change a behavior or belief. I believe there are 8 different Archetypes of Influence. While you may naturally resonate with one influence archetype over others, the art of influence is not about exclusivity but rather the situational application. You need to use a different influence style depending on who and what you are dealing with.

To identify your influence style, reflect on how you typically interact with others to persuade or motivate them. Are you more of a collaborator, using teamwork and relationship-building? Or perhaps you lean towards being a driver, focusing on results and taking charge? Maybe you are a connector, emphasizing communication and networking to get things done. Understanding your influence style can help you leverage your strengths and adapt your approach to effectively engage and inspire those around you.

Your 'influencing style' is a lot of what your leadership style is.... 1. Assertive- direct and confident in your communication? 2. Collaborative - do you like to involve other's, get their opinion and input ? 3. Inspirational - do you like to appeal to emotion, use storytelling & influence them through big vision & personal motivations? 4. Analytical - do you like using data, facts and logical reasoning to influence others? Understanding how you like to talk, persuade and lead others will help you understand your own style and figure out how you can improve

Seeking feedback is a necessary component of effective leadership. Both formal and informal leaders, as well as anyone aiming to use their influence, should consistently seek feedback. This practice not only helps refine influence style but also normalizes the process of giving and receiving feedback within the organization. Additionally, seeking feedback is an exercise in humility, demonstrating a leader’s commitment to personal growth and the betterment of the team.

Focus on your BEHAVIOUR, Not Personality. If you received negative feedback, it does not make you a bad person or a failure. Figure out the specific actions, decisions, or behaviours that you need to improve, rather than making judgments about your character or personality. If someone is unable to give you non-judgemental feedback, then you do not need to take it. It is upto you to decide and figure out what you are doing well and what you want to improve.

The art of influence is not about sticking to one style and just repeating that. You need to be able to convince OTHERS, persuade them to your point of view - so you need to understand how THEY respond, what will make them change their mind. So don't get stuck just using one style or one approach - try different ways and change your influencing style based on your audience