How do you handle a peer who spreads rumors about you in the office?

This is an issue I often advise on as it can be very disruptive for your team and, of course, very difficult for the individual subject to the rumours. The nature of the rumours are key - general tittle tattle may be dealt with between the individuals themselves but the more inappropriate they are, the more likely formal action is going to be required (and employers should have things like anti-bullying and harassment policies in place making it clear that such behaviour will not be tolerated).

I had a coworker spread rumors about me and I ignored them because I knew she did not know me. It got so bad that she approached me and told me the rumor not realizing I was the person she was talking about. I had a one on one conversation with her and told her I did not participate in that behavior, and I told her how her rumors or the spreading thereof could negatively affect both of our jobs. I also told her that if it continued I would report it to both our supervisors first, then Human Resources. I remained calm during our entire conversation. She stopped for a while but picked up the bad habit again later. Ultimately she was punished for her bad behavior, as I was not the only one she was doing this to.

Employers should always prevent staff taking matters into their own hands - hence why it is so important to have policies in place and ensure that staff are aware of them, and managers are trained. That way, if an employee has an issue like this they know who to speak to and what the process will be. In the same vein, if managers know how to deal with such situations they can address early before it escalates.

If people do not stop spreading rumours after being told not to or the nature of the rumours are clearly inappropriate then of course disciplinary action is likely relevant. Employers should be ensuring that employees are going to their line managers about this so that the management can investigate appropriately and gather any relevant evidence. Issues like this are very rarely going to be in writing and it should be the management that are talking to potential witnesses to ensure that due process is followed. Again, if the process and policy is clear and well-known this will prevent employee detectives which I can guarantee you will only make matters worse!

When misunderstandings occur, I find it best to confront the issue head-on calmly and in private. It's never a good idea to call someone out on the sales floor. Ask them where they're getting their information about you, or what you may have done to elicit their actions. Perhaps an explanation or a sincere apology will do the trick so that everyone can move on.

We're back to considering the nature of the rumours. More innocuous, general tittle-tattle can be dealt with by line management having an informal meeting with the employees in question. Try and understand what has been said and why, make it clear that this isn't appropriate at work and highlight the impact this can have on the person subject to the rumours. This approach isn't right if the rumours are totally inappropriate in any way or this is a pattern of behaviour that has been dealt with informally in the past. In the latter situation, disciplinary action is the appropriate route and your policy should be followed at that point.

Fine if the rumours are so innocent that an employee finds it best to address it directly, but there should always be substantive policies in place making it clear to all staff that such matters can amount to bullying which will trigger formal action. Most staff will likely find it awkward to address it with the culprit directly - at least in my experience that is the case - so ensuring that line managers are given all the tools to address these issues swiftly and professionally is key. Getting it wrong at the managerial level opens up a can of legal worms and will have a massive impact on the workforce generally if they see such issues mismanaged.

If a direct conversation doesn't clear things up, then it may be time to involve a supervisor. Make sure you explain the situation in a neutral manner, let them know you tried to handle this directly and how it's affecting your work. Hopefully they will address the issue themselves or with the assistance of HR.

Why not just ask them politely why they are spreading rumours about you, when they are not true, and ask them not to do so? Or of course you could spread your own, more outrageous rumours …

If a colleague were to spread rumors or any misinformation about me in the office, I would send some form of written communication (via office messaging system or email) and say: I understand that you are under the impression that [fill in rumor/misinformation]. Can you please let me know exactly what has been said about me/the situation so that I can address it directly with you and/or [insert supervisors] if necessary and correct any inaccuracies. In future, can you please discuss these sorts of things directly with me to confirm that your information is correct prior communicating with our other colleagues? I like to get the other person’s take in writing just in case the situation escalates and HR or someone else needs to be alerted.