How do you handle difficult or sensitive conversations via video conferencing?

1 Prepare yourself and the other person

Before you initiate or join a video call for a difficult or sensitive conversation, make sure you are mentally and emotionally ready. Identify the main purpose and desired outcome of the conversation, and anticipate the possible reactions and responses from the other person. Prepare some key points and examples to support your message, and rehearse them if necessary. Also, give the other person a heads-up about the topic and the tone of the conversation, so they can prepare themselves as well. Avoid surprises or ambushes that can trigger defensiveness or resentment.

2 Choose the right time and setting

Timing and context are important factors for any conversation, but especially for difficult or sensitive ones. Choose a time that works for both of you, and avoid scheduling the call right before or after another meeting or deadline. Make sure you have enough time and privacy to talk without interruptions or distractions. Find a quiet and comfortable place to sit, and check your internet connection, audio, and video quality. Adjust your lighting, camera angle, and background to create a professional and respectful impression.

3 Be clear and respectful

When you start the video call, greet the other person warmly and thank them for their time. Then, get to the point and state the main reason for the conversation. Be clear and concise about what you want to say, and use neutral and respectful language. Avoid blaming, accusing, or judging the other person, and focus on facts and behaviors rather than personalities or intentions. Acknowledge any positive aspects or contributions from the other person, and express your appreciation or recognition.

4 Listen and empathize

A difficult or sensitive conversation is not a one-way monologue, but a two-way dialogue. After you deliver your message, give the other person a chance to respond and share their thoughts and feelings. Listen actively and attentively to what they say, and show that you are interested and concerned. Use verbal and non-verbal cues, such as nodding, smiling, or saying "I see" or "I understand", to indicate your engagement and rapport. Empathize with their emotions and perspectives, and validate their concerns or frustrations. Avoid interrupting, arguing, or dismissing them.

5 Seek solutions and agreements

The goal of a difficult or sensitive conversation is not to win an argument or impose your will, but to find a mutually acceptable solution or agreement. After you listen and empathize with the other person, ask them for their suggestions or ideas on how to resolve the issue or improve the situation. Share your own expectations or proposals, and try to find a common ground or compromise. Be flexible and open-minded, but also firm and realistic. Summarize the main points and actions that you both agree on, and confirm them verbally or in writing.

6 End on a positive note

The last impression you leave on the other person can affect the future of your relationship and collaboration. Therefore, end the video call on a positive note, and show that you value and respect them. Thank them again for their time and participation, and express your hope or confidence that things will get better or smoother. Offer your support or assistance if needed, and invite them to follow up with you if they have any questions or concerns. Say goodbye politely and warmly, and smile.