Public speaking is a valuable skill that can help you communicate effectively, persuade others, and boost your confidence. However, it also comes with certain etiquette rules that you should follow to respect your audience, your hosts, and yourself. In this article, we will discuss some of the most important public speaking etiquette rules and how to apply them in different situations.
Before you prepare and deliver your speech, you should have a clear idea of what you want to achieve and how you want to impact your audience. Your purpose will guide your choice of topic, tone, language, and structure. It will also help you avoid irrelevant or inappropriate content that might confuse or offend your listeners. For example, if your purpose is to inform, you should focus on facts, evidence, and examples. If your purpose is to persuade, you should appeal to emotions, values, and beliefs.
To know your purpose is to set out your objective. Answer this question: how would I like my audience to feel and think after the talk?
Here are some tips that I follow: 1. Don't ever be crass, rude, or political. You're there for the audience, don't get people off side 2. Be on time. Start on time, end on time. The event has a program to follow, and audience has places to be. If you start late, ask the organizer if they'd like you to help them make up the time 3. Be relevant! This is about what the audience gains, not what you know. Tailor your content to be interesting to them - not to you.
It's imperative for a speaker to know their purpose, which directs the outcome. I remember making a presentation to a VIP, believing it was clear why. After the event, peers asked questions that I thought were answered during the presentation, but weren't. The feedback I received is: 1. Get to the point from the beginning (no one can read your mind) 2. State the reason for the speech ("I'm here to...", "I want you to consider...", "If we did X, the outcome would be...") to help the audience answer their question "Why should I listen?" 3. Always observe your audience (confusion is usually an evident facial expression)
A good way to approach this is to ask yourself the following. "How do I want my audience to think, feel, act and speak afterwards?". That serves as a good template.
Before stepping on the stage, I make sure I am crystal clear about the purpose of my speech. Whether it's to inform, persuade, inspire, or entertain, knowing the purpose helps in crafting a focused and impactful message.
Another essential rule of public speaking etiquette is to know your audience and tailor your speech accordingly. You should research your audience's background, interests, expectations, and needs before you design your speech. You should also adapt your speech to the context, occasion, and setting of your presentation. For example, if you are speaking to a professional audience, you should use formal language, avoid jargon, and cite credible sources. If you are speaking to a casual audience, you should use conversational language, humor, and stories.
In my experience, understanding your audience is crucial for public speaking. However, it's equally important to maintain authenticity and integrity in your delivery. Balancing audience adaptation with staying true to your message is key. Respect and understand your audience, but let your values and unique perspective shine. Authenticity resonates, making your presentation memorable and impactful. By understanding your audience and presenting authentically, you create a meaningful experience for both you and your listeners. Respect public speaking etiquette while being true to your voice.
If you speak at an organization, find out what the members call it and use their name for it. My college changed its name in 2020, but it used to be named Northwest Christian University, and we called it NCU. A speaker who visited our campus called it "Northwest" about a dozen times in her talk. It just so happens there's another college in our region called Northwest University. She gave an excellent talk, but every time she called us "Northwest," there was another moment where she unintentionally conveyed to us that she had no idea who we were and the talk was designed for someone else. It's an easily prevented mistake -- just ask your liaison at the organization what their name for it is, so you can get it right.
I always ask the organiser/client, depending on what I am trying to achieve, to give me the numbers or emails of three or four people who will be in the audience. I either have coffee with them or a virtual meeting. I learn where they are, and they aim to go. Especially when I help a company with strategy work, I interview the CEO (if possible), some management and then people on the ground who will not be in the session. I put in a lot of work, but that is being a professional speaker.
Understanding the audience is key. I take time to research and analyze my audience to tailor my message accordingly. Knowing their interests, needs, and expectations helps in establishing a connection and keeping them engaged.
Understand your audience and understand yourself. Know how you could be perceived by the audience. I make a very genuine and heartfelt acknowledgment that being mostly white, and mostly straight, and mostly male, I am perceived in a peticular way. I make it known that my story is different and even perhaps easier than those who don't look like me. It breaks my heart that the world ?? is this way, but others who don't look like me can have a more difficult journey, as difficult as mine has been. My job as a connection and communication expert, must acknowledge this, even if it seems awkward at times. It is my hope that all stories can be shared equally.
Respecting your time limit is a sign of professionalism and courtesy. You should practice your speech beforehand and time yourself to ensure that you can cover your main points within the allotted time. You should also check with your host or organizer about the schedule and the format of your presentation. For example, if you are part of a panel or a Q&A session, you should leave some time for interaction and feedback. If you are the only speaker, you should avoid going over or under your time limit.
We are all familiar with speakers and presenters who run over time, and say “in the interests of time” and then continue to talk for another 10 minutes & expect subsequent speakers to shorten their presentation. If you are allocated 10 minutes, plan & prepare to deliver in 8 minutes. Time is our valuable, if it could be bottled and sold, the seller would be very wealthy. It’s our responsibility to respect the time others have & give us, and to stick to it. Start on time, stay on time & finish on time.
I've taught nonverbal communication for over twenty years, and students are surprised to learn use of time is a nonverbal message. But it's actually one of the most powerful nonverbals, and what it communicates more than anything is respect. This is what I have them write down, and they can repeat it back to me decades later: "The way you use other people's time when you have control over it communicates respect or an utter lack of it." That doesn't just mean don't talk too long; it also means don't go way under what they expected and requested of you, and it means don't pad your talk with underprepared content. When you're finished, if they feel as though they hit the jackpot relative to the time they gave you, then you gave them respect.
Three things I learned from a gifted public speaker: 1. Be sincere. 2. Be brief. 3. Be seated. The guidelines above will help keep the ego of over sharing at bay.
Know how long you have to speak and practice to make sure that your talk fits the time allocated. It's so frustrating for event organisers if a speaker over-runs. That affects the rest of the event and the other speakers. Plan your time to allow for questions. And get there early and get set up so you start on time. Don't let latecomers put you off starting on time. Get started so that you do not over-run. If people are late then they miss the beginning!
I can't believe this is a point, but I understand why. I once spoke at an event, and a speaker walked up to the podium and uttered the following: "How much time do I have?". I would never ever in my life use that speaker if I were an organiser because they showed utter disrespect to the audience, the client and the profession. Respect people's time, they are not there for you, the speaker, they are there for themselves and to get value.
There are some general etiquette rules that apply to any public speaking situation. You should dress appropriately for the occasion, audience, and venue. You should arrive early and check the equipment, the lighting, and the seating arrangement. You should greet your audience, introduce yourself, and state your topic and purpose. You should maintain eye contact, use gestures, and modulate your voice. You should avoid distractions, such as fidgeting, reading from notes, or checking your phone. You should thank your audience, your host, and anyone who helped you prepare or deliver your speech.
Be early. Let me say that again: BE EARLY. If you speak at 10, you should be there no later than 9 to do the sound and equipment check. It is best to be there at 8 so that you can do the checks and go and meet and greet the audience and talk to them. Interactions during this time can shape and change what you say. Match your audience to some level and dress a little bit better to be seen as a leader, but don't look down on them. I am known in the industry as a good dresser, and it has become part of my brand. Meet the client/CEO if they are there and talk to them about what you plan to say and if they want to add something or highlight something. I can do this because I have the ability to deliver a 45-minute keynote impromptu. ??
Alright, let me take this up a notch. Consider the etiquette for protocolar events (ex: Ceremonies, Governmental events, formal receptions). Basic etiquette unfortunately does not fly here. That being said, there is work to be done by the presenter to understand the traditional protocol and associated etiquette. Wether you are the MC or simply giving a talk within the event, it's important you are aware of the etiquette rules of the organization. It's simply out of respect and professionalism that this should be considered. Often, for these types of events, there is an ''Etiquette/Protocol Officer'' that can give you essential insights into the procedures to follow.
Adhering to basic etiquette is a must. I maintain good posture, make eye contact, and use appropriate language. I avoid offensive jokes or comments, ensuring a respectful and inclusive atmosphere during my presentation.
Etiquette is so subjective to context. For example, is it a wedding toast in Alabama, USA, or in Seoul, South Korea? Are you a panelist for a science conference, or are you promoting mental health on a college campus? Because etiquette is subjective, you have to do your research. Protocol, however, is not subjective. When we talk about "protocol" and "etiquette," it's important to understand that they are similar yet distinct concepts. Protocol is all about the formal rules and conventions that dictate behavior in official settings. This is especially relevant in government, diplomatic, and military contexts. Etiquette is more about the customary codes of polite behavior in society or among specific groups.
Arriving early allows you to troubleshoot technicalities and get comfortable with the space. Greeting the audience and introducing yourself establishes a connection. Non-verbal cues like eye contact and gestures enhance engagement. Minimizing distractions keeps the focus on your message. Finally, thanking everyone involved displays appreciation and professionalism, leaving a positive impression.
Public speaking can be challenging for many reasons. You might face technical difficulties, unexpected questions, hostile reactions, or nervousness. You should prepare for these challenges and handle them with grace and confidence. You should have a backup plan in case of equipment failure, such as a printed copy of your slides or notes. You should anticipate possible questions and objections and prepare clear and concise answers. You should acknowledge and respect different opinions and perspectives and avoid arguments or confrontations. You should practice relaxation techniques, such as breathing, stretching, or visualizing, to calm your nerves and boost your energy.
I will not speak if I am not nervous. It keeps me honest and focused on delivering value to the audience. You WILL face difficult questions and hostile people. That is normal. Just remember this: it is NOT you; your message is simply triggering something in them, and they are directing that discomfort towards you. Help them uncover what the trigger is and help them overcome it. You are a speaker who is helping people shift to a different level of thinking and doing, and this is bound to happen. Be empathic and understanding.
Do not be afraid to say you do not know the answer to a question. It happened to me several times, I just make a note of the question and offer to come back to the person at a later stage with the answer (and I do come back!). Nobody knows everything. I rather say I do not know than give an answer that is incorrect or misleading. Honesty is always appreciated.
Public speaking comes with challenges, and acknowledging them is part of the preparation. Whether it's overcoming nervousness or handling unexpected technical issues, I anticipate challenges and have strategies in place to tackle them confidently.
Being prepared for unforeseen situations like technical glitches or tough questions is key. Having backup plans, concise answers, and a respectful attitude toward diverse opinions can help navigate such challenges. Using relaxation techniques can help manage nerves and maintain energy levels throughout the speech. Ultimately, preparation and adaptability pave the way to navigate through unforeseen hurdles during presentations.
One of the best ways to improve your public speaking skills is to seek and accept feedback. You should ask for feedback from your audience, your host, your peers, or your mentors. You should listen to their comments, suggestions, and criticisms with an open mind and a positive attitude. You should identify your strengths and weaknesses and work on them for your next speech. You should also give feedback to others who speak in public and share your insights and experiences.
Seeking and embracing feedback is crucial for improvement. I actively encourage the audience to provide constructive feedback. Reflecting on this feedback helps me refine my speaking skills and address any areas that may need improvement.
Never talk bad about other speakers. A rising tide lifts all boats. Chosing a speaker is a difficult decision. I've recommended others when it turns out I'm not the right fit for an event. We can all make a positive difference in the world. ????
Remember the opportunities others provide you. A speaker doesn't become reputable on their own. We all have help. Someone trusted you to speak to their audience. They trusted you to represent their brand well. Trusted you to show up. Don't take that for granted, as opportunities can quickly dry up. Be the speaker who event coordinators love hiring because you're easy to work with based on your positive regard for speaker etiquette.
Besides the core elements, I also consider factors like the venue setup, audiovisual requirements, and potential distractions. Being prepared for various scenarios ensures a smoother presentation. In summary, following public speaking etiquette involves a holistic approach, combining a clear understanding of purpose and audience with effective time management, etiquette, and continuous improvement through feedback.