How can you use empathy and rapport to influence without manipulation?

1 What is empathy and rapport?

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings, thoughts, and perspectives of another person. Rapport is the state of mutual trust, harmony, and connection that you establish with someone. Empathy and rapport are essential skills for effective negotiation, because they help you to create a positive atmosphere, reduce conflicts, and find common ground.

3 How to build rapport in negotiation

Building rapport in negotiation requires you to communicate effectively, find similarities, and use humor and compliments. Communicating effectively means using clear, respectful, and polite language, avoiding jargon and acronyms, and adapting your style to the other person's preferences. Finding similarities means identifying common values, experiences, or interests that you share with the other person, and using them to create rapport. Using humor and compliments means making appropriate jokes, praising the other person's strengths or achievements, and showing appreciation for their cooperation.

4 How to use empathy and rapport to influence without manipulation

When using empathy and rapport to influence without manipulation, positive persuasion techniques should be employed. Framing presents one's proposal or request in a way that emphasizes its benefits or alignment with the other person's interests. Storytelling is an effective way to illustrate a point or inspire the other person, while reciprocity involves offering something of value and then asking for something in return. Social proof demonstrates that the proposal or request is supported by credible sources, and scarcity creates a sense of urgency or exclusivity for the proposal, highlighting the potential costs of missing out.

5 How to avoid manipulation in negotiation

To avoid manipulation in negotiation, be honest, respectful, and ethical in communication and behavior. Manipulation is a deceptive, coercive, or pressuring attempt to influence someone against their will or best interests, which can damage your reputation, trust, and relationship with the other person. Signs of manipulation include lying, threatening, flattering, guilt-tripping, and gaslighting. Lying involves making false or misleading statements or omitting important facts; threatening involves using intimidation, blackmail, or ultimatums; flattering involves using excessive or insincere praise, charm, or seduction; guilt-tripping involves making the other person feel bad; and gaslighting involves making the other person doubt their own perception.