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How can you respect your mentee's autonomy?

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Mentoring is a rewarding and challenging role that involves supporting, guiding, and empowering your mentee. However, it also requires respecting your mentee's autonomy, which means allowing them to make their own decisions, learn from their mistakes, and pursue their goals. How can you respect your mentee's autonomy without compromising your mentoring relationship? Here are some tips to help you.

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1 Understand their needs

The first step to respect your mentee's autonomy is to understand their needs, preferences, and expectations. Ask them what they want to achieve, how they learn best, and what kind of feedback they appreciate. Listen to their concerns, challenges, and successes. Don't assume that you know what they need or want, or that your way is the best way. Instead, be open-minded, curious, and respectful of their perspectives.

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Emily Frenkel

Innovative Problem Solver Driving Growth For Mission-Driven Organizations | Data-Driven Digital Marketer Creating Harmonious Partnerships | Writer | #Cyclist #CODA #TechJunkie. Let's talk!
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Trust your mentee to tell you what they need support with. Assuming what they should hear from you is bound to put a sour taste in their mouth. However, if a conversation leads you towards wanting to give advice they didn’t ask for, it is okay to use that opportunity to ask if they would be receptive to hearing your feedback on what they had shared.

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2 Provide options and guidance

The second step to respect your mentee's autonomy is to provide options and guidance, rather than instructions and solutions. Help them explore different possibilities, weigh the pros and cons, and identify the resources and support they need. Don't tell them what to do or how to do it, or solve their problems for them. Instead, ask questions, share your insights and experiences, and encourage them to think critically and creatively.

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Emily Frenkel

Innovative Problem Solver Driving Growth For Mission-Driven Organizations | Data-Driven Digital Marketer Creating Harmonious Partnerships | Writer | #Cyclist #CODA #TechJunkie. Let's talk!
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Encouraging mentees to explore different approaches towards reaching solutions allows them to build confidence within themselves. Confidence reduces codependency, which I believe we can all appreciate. Trusting in your mentees to flourish being the best versions of themselves, while they have your support is ideal.

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3 Empower and encourage

The third step to respect your mentee's autonomy is to empower and encourage them, rather than control and micromanage them. Give them space and time to work on their tasks, projects, and goals, and trust them to do their best. Don't interfere, judge, or criticize their choices, actions, or outcomes. Instead, acknowledge their efforts, celebrate their achievements, and help them learn from their failures.

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4 Respect their boundaries

The fourth step to respect your mentee's autonomy is to respect their boundaries, which means respecting their privacy, confidentiality, and consent. Don't pry into their personal or professional matters, or share their information with others without their permission. Don't impose your values, beliefs, or opinions on them, or pressure them to do something they don't want to do. Instead, be supportive, compassionate, and ethical.

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5 Seek feedback and improve

The fifth step to respect your mentee's autonomy is to seek feedback and improve, which means being open to learning from your mentee, as well as from other sources. Ask your mentee how they feel about your mentoring style, what they like and dislike, and what they suggest for improvement. Listen to their feedback, and act on it. Don't take it personally, or defend yourself. Instead, be humble, grateful, and willing to change.

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6 Model autonomy

The sixth step to respect your mentee's autonomy is to model autonomy, which means being a role model of self-directed learning, growth, and leadership. Share your own goals, challenges, and successes with your mentee, and how you overcome them. Demonstrate how you make decisions, solve problems, and seek feedback. Don't hide your weaknesses, or pretend to know everything. Instead, be authentic, confident, and curious.

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Emily Frenkel

Innovative Problem Solver Driving Growth For Mission-Driven Organizations | Data-Driven Digital Marketer Creating Harmonious Partnerships | Writer | #Cyclist #CODA #TechJunkie. Let's talk!
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Practice what you preach! ?? That’s been my motto for a while now. Everyone goes through their own journeys with ups and downs, being honest about it and sharing your story may potentially prevent others from repeating your mistakes. There is beauty in humility and so much to learn from other people’s accomplishments as well. Never stop asking questions that would help foster your growth. In the mentee/mentor relationships I’ve had, the learning has always been a two-way street.

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7 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?

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How can you respect your mentee's autonomy?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Understand their needs

2 Provide options and guidance

3 Empower and encourage

4 Respect their boundaries

5 Seek feedback and improve

6 Model autonomy

7 Here’s what else to consider

Mentoring

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How can you respect your mentee's autonomy?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Understand their needs

2 Provide options and guidance

3 Empower and encourage

4 Respect their boundaries

5 Seek feedback and improve

6 Model autonomy

7 Here’s what else to consider

Mentoring

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