How can you navigate conflicts with peers in a support group?

1 Respect boundaries

One of the most important aspects of peer support is respecting each other's boundaries, which are the limits and rules that people set for themselves and others in their relationships. Boundaries can be physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, or social, and they can vary depending on the person, the situation, and the context. Boundaries help people to protect their autonomy, privacy, and dignity, and to communicate their needs and preferences. Respecting boundaries means asking for consent, listening to cues, honoring requests, and avoiding assumptions, judgments, or pressure. When you respect boundaries, you show that you value and trust your peers, and that you expect the same from them.

2 Communicate effectively

Another key skill for navigating conflicts is effective communication, which is the ability to express yourself clearly, respectfully, and honestly, and to listen actively, empathically, and openly to others. Effective communication helps you to understand and be understood, to resolve misunderstandings, to share feedback, and to negotiate solutions. Effective communication also involves being aware of your own and others' emotions, triggers, and biases, and managing them appropriately. When you communicate effectively, you show that you care about your peers, and that you are willing to learn from them.

3 Acknowledge diversity

Peer support groups are often composed of people from different backgrounds, cultures, identities, and perspectives, which can enrich the group's learning and growth. However, diversity can also create challenges, such as stereotypes, prejudices, discrimination, or oppression. Acknowledging diversity means recognizing and appreciating the differences and similarities among your peers, and being mindful of how they affect your interactions and expectations. Acknowledging diversity also means being open to learning from your peers, and challenging your own and others' assumptions, biases, or behaviors that may harm or exclude others. When you acknowledge diversity, you show that you respect and celebrate your peers, and that you support their inclusion and equity.

4 Seek consensus

Peer support groups are based on the principle of mutuality, which means that all members have equal rights, responsibilities, and opportunities to participate, contribute, and benefit from the group. Mutuality also implies that decisions are made collectively and democratically, rather than by a single leader or authority. Seeking consensus means striving for a general agreement among your peers on the group's goals, norms, and actions, and being willing to compromise, cooperate, and collaborate. Seeking consensus also means being flexible, creative, and respectful of different opinions, preferences, and needs. When you seek consensus, you show that you value and empower your peers, and that you share a common vision and purpose.

5 Address conflicts

Despite your best efforts, conflicts may still arise in your peer support group, and they may not be easy to resolve. Addressing conflicts means being proactive, constructive, and respectful in dealing with the issues and the people involved, and avoiding escalation, avoidance, or suppression. Addressing conflicts also means being accountable, transparent, and fair in the process and the outcome, and seeking feedback, support, or mediation if needed. When you address conflicts, you show that you are committed and responsible to your peers, and that you seek to restore and maintain the group's harmony and trust.

6 Practice self-care

Finally, navigating conflicts with peers in a support group can be stressful, exhausting, and emotional, and it can affect your own mental health and well-being. Practicing self-care means taking care of your own needs, feelings, and interests, and setting healthy boundaries for yourself and others. Practicing self-care also means seeking help, support, or resources if you feel overwhelmed, hurt, or unsafe, and taking breaks, rest, or time off if you need to. When you practice self-care, you show that you respect and love yourself, and that you are able to give and receive support in a balanced and sustainable way.

7 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?