How can you help team members resolve conflicts without involving a manager?

1 Identify the root cause

The first step to resolving a conflict is to understand what is causing it. Is it a misunderstanding, a personality clash, a difference in values, or a competition for resources? By asking open-ended questions and listening actively, you can help the parties involved to express their perspectives and feelings. You can also use tools such as the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument to assess how each person approaches conflict and what their preferred style is.

2 Facilitate a dialogue

Once you have identified the root cause, you can help the team members to communicate with each other in a constructive way. You can set some ground rules for the dialogue, such as respecting each other, avoiding personal attacks, and focusing on the problem, not the person. You can also use techniques such as paraphrasing, summarizing, and reflecting to clarify and validate what each party is saying. Your role is not to judge or impose a solution, but to guide and support the team members to reach a mutual understanding and agreement.

3 Explore options and solutions

After the team members have shared their views and emotions, you can help them to brainstorm possible options and solutions that can address their needs and interests. You can use questions such as "What are some ways we can resolve this issue?" or "How can we meet both of your goals?" to encourage creativity and collaboration. You can also use tools such as the pros and cons list, the decision matrix, or the SMART criteria to evaluate and compare the options and solutions.

4 Agree on an action plan

The final step to resolving a conflict is to agree on an action plan that outlines the specific steps, responsibilities, and deadlines for implementing the solution. You can help the team members to write down the action plan and sign it as a commitment. You can also use questions such as "How will we monitor our progress?" or "How will we handle any challenges or changes?" to anticipate and address any potential obstacles or risks.

5 Follow up and provide feedback

After the team members have agreed on an action plan, you should follow up with them regularly to check on their progress and provide feedback. You can use tools such as the feedback sandwich, the STAR method, or the 360-degree feedback to give constructive and balanced feedback that acknowledges their efforts, highlights their achievements, and suggests areas for improvement. You can also use questions such as "How do you feel about the outcome?" or "What have you learned from this experience?" to celebrate their success and encourage their growth.

6 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?