Giving feedback on written documents or emails can be challenging, especially if you want to be constructive, respectful, and clear. However, feedback is essential for improving communication, collaboration, and performance. How can you use mindfulness to enhance your feedback skills and avoid common pitfalls? Here are some tips to help you.
Before you start writing or speaking your feedback, ask yourself what your purpose is. Are you trying to help the other person improve, learn, or grow? Or are you trying to criticize, blame, or vent? Mindfulness can help you align your intention with your words and tone, and avoid sending mixed or negative messages.
Before offering feedback, it's crucial to clarify your purpose. Take a moment to identify your intention behind the feedback. Are you seeking to provide assistance, make corrections, offer encouragement, or simply convey information? Clearly defining your objective ensures that your feedback is targeted and constructive, fostering a more effective and purposeful communication process.
Before you start writing, ask yourself what you are feeling. Allow yourself to feel any reactionary emotions, if they are present. Stay cognizant of why you are providing feedback. Reframe your thoughts if necessary.
Before providing feedback, go within and identify your ideal outcome including the main idea and feeling would you like the reader to have when finished. Is your feedback necessary, relevant, and/or solicited? Next, identify your why: is it to be of service to others or more for your benefit? Be sure to take time and label any biases and limited information you may have too before you begin.
Intention is everything! When providing feedback on written documents or emails, it's important to approach the task with mindfulness, especially regarding your intention behind the feedback. Before diving in, take a moment to center yourself and set a positive intention. Ask yourself: Am I coming from a place of genuine care and support, or am I reacting emotionally? For example, let's say you're reviewing a colleague's report. Instead of immediately pointing out errors or areas for improvement, pause and consider the purpose of your feedback. Are you aiming to help them grow and succeed, or are you merely seeking perfection? By maintaining a mindful intention, you can ensure that your feedback is actually constructive and well-received.
Feedback can trigger strong emotions, both in yourself and in the receiver. You may feel frustrated, angry, or disappointed by the document or email you are reviewing. The other person may feel hurt, defensive, or confused by your feedback. Mindfulness can help you manage your emotions and avoid reacting impulsively or harshly. Take a few deep breaths, acknowledge your feelings, and focus on the facts and the solutions.
Maintaining a composed and objective stance is essential when providing feedback. It is crucial to detach emotions from the evaluation process. By concentrating on the content and the message itself, rather than making judgments about the individual's character, feedback becomes more constructive and unbiased. This approach fosters a professional and respectful environment, enabling a more focused discussion on the substance of the communication at hand.
Identify the emotions that arise around the feedback you want to give and the person (or people) you are giving it to. Connect the underlying expectation or value being challenged for you. Take time to label those emotions, allowing them to be released. If your emotions are intense, it is always good to wait until the intensity has subsided.
The way you phrase your feedback can make a big difference in how it is received and understood. Mindfulness can help you choose your words carefully and avoid vague, judgmental, or personal comments. Use specific examples, positive suggestions, and respectful language. Avoid absolutes, generalizations, and accusations. For example, instead of saying "Your report is poorly written and full of errors", say "I noticed some spelling and grammar mistakes in your report. Here are some corrections and tips to improve your writing."
Utilizing constructive language in feedback involves framing comments positively by emphasizing strengths before addressing areas for improvement. By specifically identifying what works well and where attention is needed, the feedback becomes more actionable and encouraging. Additionally, it is important to avoid blame by employing "I" statements to express thoughts rather than resorting to accusatory "you" statements. This approach fosters a collaborative and solution-oriented dialogue, promoting a more positive and receptive atmosphere for feedback recipients.
Feedback is most effective when it is timely, relevant, and frequent. Mindfulness can help you decide when and how to deliver your feedback, and avoid delaying, avoiding, or overloading the other person. Give feedback as soon as possible after the document or email is sent or received, but not when you or the other person are too busy, stressed, or distracted. Choose the appropriate channel, whether it is email, phone, or face-to-face, and make sure you have enough time and attention to communicate clearly and respectfully.
Selecting the appropriate time for providing feedback is crucial for its effectiveness. While timeliness is essential, it's equally important to consider the recipient's workload and stress levels. Ensuring that feedback is delivered when the individual is receptive allows for a more constructive exchange. It's advisable to avoid offering feedback in the heat of the moment, as emotions may be heightened. If necessary, waiting for a calmer and more suitable moment contributes to a more thoughtful and well-received communication of feedback.
Feedback is not a one-way communication, but a dialogue that requires listening and understanding. Mindfulness can help you listen actively and empathically to the other person's response, and avoid interrupting, dismissing, or arguing. Pay attention to their words, tone, and body language, and ask open-ended questions to clarify, confirm, or explore their perspective. Acknowledge their feelings, concerns, or challenges, and express your appreciation and support.
Demonstrating empathy in feedback involves actively listening to the other's perspective before providing input. By understanding their point of view and acknowledging their efforts, a more compassionate and considerate feedback process is possible. Recognizing the other's intentions fosters a collaborative atmosphere, encouraging open communication and facilitating a constructive exchange of ideas. This empathetic approach not only enhances the quality of feedback but also strengthens the overall working relationship.
Feedback is not a one-time event, but a continuous process that requires follow-up and feedback. Mindfulness can help you monitor and evaluate the impact and outcome of your feedback, and avoid forgetting, ignoring, or neglecting the other person. Check in regularly with the other person, and provide positive reinforcement, constructive criticism, or additional guidance as needed. Solicit feedback from the other person as well, and use it to improve your own communication, collaboration, and performance.
When reading or corresponding, be sure to read through a few times. Look at each point that needs to be addressed and be sure you clearly understand the points, before responding. If anything needs further clarification, ask before assume. Show the other person you are actively engaged with what they are communicating so they feel heard and seen. Compliment their work, and if needed provide constructive criticism in a kind way, so it will be received. Think of how YOU would be able to receive the feedback, without becoming defensive. Ask for feedback and suggestions from the other person so it is a two way conversation and you are both engaged. Make sure they know you are open to improving your communication for your mutual benefit.
Clear thinking and clear writing go hand in hand.This must be built on appropriate response given in good time. Care should be taken not be overwhelmed by emotions but control and due deligence should be applied continuously to avoid mistakes or oversight.