Here's how you can navigate conflicts with your superiors in Direct Sales.

At Bob Baker Toyota I helped a team member, Mark, handle a heated disagreement with a coworker over a scheduling mix-up. I calmly asked them to step aside and listened to each person individually to ensure they felt heard. This immediately reduced some tension. Bringing them together, I focused on the facts and reminded them of our common goals. I introduced stress management techniques like deep breathing and pausing before responding. This approach helped us identify the root issue and find a solution. By staying composed and with honest and open communication, we effectively resolved the conflict and strengthened our teamwork.

There is an African proverb that says ‘you don’t insult the mouth of the crocodile while you’re still crossing the river’. Don’t pick fights with your superiors, instead: 1. Be alert enough to nip the conflict in the bud before it escalates and spirals out of control. 2. Don’t add to the conflict but look to diffuse it. 3. Resist the temptation to respond immediately and emotionally. Come back later with a logically analysed answer that will help resolve the conflict. 4. Don’t escalate the issue by involving your superior’s superiors. 5. Don’t become passive or submissive and ‘accept’ the conflict meekly. Assertively handle the matter for a win : win outcome.

At MTG Wholesale, a conflict arose between two coworkers over task assignments. Recalling the wisdom that God gave us two ears and one mouth, I knew it was crucial to listen more and talk less. I invited the 2 to a private discussion, first allowing each to share their perspective without interruption. This approach helped them feel valued and understood, instantly reducing tension. By listening first, we opened a dialogue that led to a mutual understanding. Together, we reallocated tasks fairly and the conflict was resolved. This experience showed me how powerful listening can be in de-escalating workplace issues. Remember we have 2 ears and 1 mouth =) use them smart.

When communicating to resolve conflicts, do the following: 1. Resolve conflicts face to face as it greatly reduces scope of misunderstanding which frequently happens when communicating over gadgets. 2. Encourage your superior to ‘let it all out’. Letting out will make it easier for you to understand their side, and it will also calm them doing knowing that they have been heard. 3. Listen to understand to resolve, not to prove your point. 4. Control your internal monologue and mind your biases while listening. 5. Resist the temptation to interrupt mid-way, unless it is to clarify. Do it gently without obstructing your superior’s flow. 6. Resist temptation to give emotional responses. 7. Demonstrate encouraging non-verbal cues.

To resolve conflicts effectively, warring parties need to talk to each other in a calm, rational manner, with the sole purpose of finding a solution. For this they need to hear out the other as well as articulate their own side of the story. 1. State clearly what is bothering you. 2. Don’t get defensive about what your side of the story, say it as it is. 3. Keep your voice calm and as matter-of-fact as possible. Avoid ‘emotional drama’. 4. Avoid blame games or playing the victim. 5. Don’t hold back if it’s part of the problem and needs to be stated.

Seek solutions that address the root cause of the conflict, as this is the only permanent way to solve the problem. Otherwise, the same conflicts will recur repeatedly.

At Prime Mortgage, I believe in the power of maintaining strong relationships and the principle of People, Product, and Purpose. This approach is dear to my heart. For example, during a challenging quarter, two team members had a disagreement over lead distribution. Instead of dictating a solution, I facilitated an open, respectful dialogue. We listened to each other's concerns and found a fair solution, reinforcing our shared purpose and trust. By valuing people and ensuring everyone felt heard, we not only resolved the conflict but also strengthened our team. This experience underscored how meaningful relationships drive success and align with our core values.