Here's how you can handle feedback you disagree with or find unfair.

The most important step in handling feedback is to listen without interrupting. Respecting different perspectives helps you grow. Instead of reacting immediately, stay calm and assess the feedback objectively. Respond with politeness and professionalism. If emotions run high, take a deep breath and sing "la la la" and "cha cha cha" to stay composed. Always take a pause to respond. Address valid concerns and be open to improvement. If you still don’t agree with the feedback, seek guidance from a mentor or senior, this always works. They can offer valuable advice or help you handle the situation effectively.

Handling feedback you disagree with can be challenging to say the least. I remember being shocked at the amount of feedback that was expected in medical school and residency. It was incredibly tough to constantly be told I could be doing better when I was operating at max capacity. It used to stress me to no end! Then, I realized all I had to do was listen! I kept my words to a minimum and just heard what they had to say. I then had the opportunity to see where they were coming from. More often than not, I found at least one piece of advice useful. And I stopped taking it so personally because I listened rather than engaging defensively.

Listen, especially up to the so-called "last drop" effect, that is, their last words, as this is often where the core of their message lies Do not assume; you may realize through the conversation itself that the other's contribution is not as different from your own thinking a If, after all this, you find the comments inappropriate, you have three options: a. If the comments are offensive, set clear boundaries, and if they persist, leave; it's clear they do not respect you b. If they come from someone on the team who persists in this behavior, it might be best to remove them from your project c. If that is not the case, (for example, if it's a client) express your gratitude for their point of view and bid farewell respectfully.

If you have received feedback you do not agree with, reflect honestly on the advice you received prior to responding. Be an active listener. Do not try to defend your actions. Even if you are right, it will not be well received. See if you can find something you both can agree on in the critique, and thank them for spending time to improve your performance! This will take you a long way in your career.

If you don't ask, how will you know? Asking questions shows interest in the other person. It shows a desire for closeness, empathy, and above all, a willingness to help or understand. Ask questions, but don't interrupt. Wait until the other person finishes and completes their arguments. To do this, write down your question and ask it at the end, without interrupting. If you interrupt, you will clearly make the situation worse. Wait. And above all, ask with respect and professionalism, not to try to impose, convince, or give advice.

Besides active listening and reflection, you should most certainly ask clarifying questions when you receive criticism you disagree with. It could be that you just do not understand what they are trying to say. Be careful when asking questions so that you do not sound too defensive. The correct tone is more of an inquisitive one. How do you handle feedback that feels unfair? Share your stories below.

If you receive feedback you do not agree with, you really have to dig deep in order to listen to what they have to say. You may find that they have made some fair points in their assessment. Be sure to acknowledge them for these and thank them for the feedback. You do not need to agree with everything they said. And by being more receptive, you leave open the door for more growth opportunities as they will want to help you more in your career. How do you handle feedback you disagree with? Let me know in the comments. : )